CONVERSATIONS WITH RAJ

JUNE 1994

VOL. 8, NO. 9

 

"BECAUSE I GO UNTO THE FATHER"

 

QUESTION: I have several questions, but the one that keeps coming back to me to ask is in regard to one of the first questions that came up in this Gathering when a gentleman stated that he found that there were two physical conditions in his experience. One seemed to not be too serious, and the other one quite serious. And the one was healed instantaneously with no apparent change of thought, to his awareness, but the other situation has continued.

 

My question really is: I would like you, in your role as Jesus, who came to raise our level of thought and to make us aware of God's love and the ability to heal, as you did (you raised the lame man, you healed the leper, you raised Lazarus, as well as others who had social problems) to give us some enlightenment on this point.

 

RAJ: One of the aspects of your question has to do with the authority issue, because it is obvious from what you have read in the Bible that I expressed authority over the human condition, whether it was of physical bodies, whether it was of the ocean, whether it was the laws of gravity. "And the word was spoken, and it was done." No process. "The word of God is quick and powerful, and mightier than a two-edged sword," and that was what was being demonstrated.

 

But! It was being demonstrated in a different time and place. No, it was being demonstrated in a different frame of mind. You might say, "the frame of mind of the time"—a time when people were not even sure how many gods there were, or what God was really like. It was a time when sacrifices were made as an appeasement to God, or to the gods. There was not a clarity, even, about the singularity of God.

 

True, there was a history available, at least to the Jews, wherein the singularity of God was already an acknowledged fact. But the Gentiles had no such assurance, confidence, or even conception, much less that this singular God was omnipotent. It is an easy concept today for most.

 

Even though you might say there is a waning belief in God, the belief is a belief of singularity of the Godhead. But this was not the common sense of God that people had in common. And so, the function of the Christ then was to anchor, if you will, the awareness of the singularity of God, the omnipotence and relevance of God to them in their daily lives—as has since been said, "one with God is a majority"—and therefore, they did not have to continue seeming to be the innocent victims of gods whom they could appease through certain processes such as sacrifices. The function of the Christ was different then than the function of the Christ is today, because of the frame of mind of the time now.

 

We have spoken at some length here about the authority issue. This is not the time for embodying the authority of God as an expressed authority of each of you or any of you. The point of spiritual growth that mankind is at today—even in the level of ignorance that everyone is embodying—is a much higher level than it was 2,000 years ago. It is a different ignorance. And so, the truth that corrects it is different.

 

There is someone in the room who asked some years ago about my statement that "if ye have the faith of a grain of mustard seed, you can say unto this mountain, 'get thee hence,' and the mountain will move." And I told him, "You can't move a mountain that isn't already moving"—meaning what I shared earlier this morning when I used the illustration of the kayak being let down into the river. You cannot desire and participate in co-creation of that desire if you haven't yielded into the Movement that is already occurring.

 

The false sense of authority has become very strong in terms of the ego. And it is utilizing all of the modern spiritual teachings called "metaphysics" to exercise this authority in the name of God without consulting God, you see—without yielding into the movement. And so I am not, generally speaking, telling anyone to say to this disease or that disease, "Get thee hence!" and assert a divine authority that they have, because...

 

I will tell you something: Everyone is closer to Home today! Closer to that point of becoming fully realized than was the case 2,000 years ago. And, you are getting close to retracing the first step away from Home, which was an assertion of independence. And the specific undoing of that assertion of independence is succumbing to, yielding to, the Father's Will once again—willingly. Not as a means of exercising authority to get through the gates of the Kingdom of Heaven, but as a means of abandoning a private intent, so that in its place the intent of God can register, be felt as the impulse, as I said, and carry you into your Sanity.

 

Whether this seems reasonable, and whether anyone likes it or not, especially those who are currently practicing one form or another of metaphysics, it is the truth. And I'm not hanging crepe here. I'm telling you the truth, even though it might seem that I am putting a negative into the air that will be a self-fulfilling negative prophecy.

 

I will tell you, if I did not say it, it would happen anyway. And so, I am telling you so that you will not be surprised, and so that when you find out that you're on a road that has a dead end, you can turn around rather than going all the way to the dead end and then turning around.

 

The conscious practice of authority over the world, the conscious practice of claiming your dominion over the world through metaphysical steps, is beginning to fail, and will continue to increasingly fail. Why? Because you've already learned from it what you were meant to learn from it.

 

First, everyone had to learn that there was a singular God—not gods many, not gods in the trees, and not gods in the lakes, etc., not gods in the animals—but a singular all-inclusive infinite intelligence that was Love, the movement of which constituted Creation, and there were no other gods beside God. You see? That's the singularity.

 

Then, you needed to know that this God was relevant (this is in the "evolution of conscious awareness"). I'm putting that in quotes because this evolution is an accommodation to the fact that everyone has chosen to have a biased perception of the Kingdom of Heaven. So there's going to appear to be a moving away from clarity and a return to clarity, even though all that happened within it [the evolution] never happened. I am speaking in terms of accommodations, here, so that there is an understanding of the seeming departure and return of the Prodigal Sons and Daughters.

 

So, I came along demonstrating the pertinence, the relevance of God to the here and now. And when I said the word, the word was done. And the people experienced the relevance. It wasn't a head trip. They saw this lame man that they had seen for years—they knew him the moment he was born—and they saw him healed. This was an experience of the presence and the power of God, and the practice or exercise of a dominion over all the earth that God gave man.

 

It was still an accommodation. It addressed the mind in its frame of reference at the moment. And it was essential to do this in the moment in order to educate the mind—begin the educative process—out of its beliefs.

 

And what else? I said, "if you have seen me, you have seen the Father." My disciples knew that when I said that, the same truth was true about them. If you have seen each other, you have seen the Father.

 

You see, the Father, in addition to being a singular God as opposed to multiple gods, was being presented also as a God of love and not a God of wrath. This was new—a God of relevance that one did not need to be afraid of. A God Who was on their side, whom they could call upon. It was the language of that day in which the ideas that I have expressed here [in this Gathering] were brought up—that you have a powerful ally, a powerful companion with you in unity. It was impossible at that time for the imminence of God to be fully expressed because of the fact that there hadn't even yet fully registered the fact that there was a singular God, whether imminent or not.

 

It fulfilled purpose for healings to occur—instantaneous healings demonstrating the relevance in the moment, and the power in the moment, of God. In a way, everything that was said was in code. That's what I mean by "accommodations." You understand that the parables were the Truth coded in language that could be grasped. Even today, I am speaking in codes—symbols that elicit, trigger realization so that you might arrive at a point of this commitment to trust that we were talking about, ...which was the same motive then. It's always the same function of the Christ, no matter what the words are.

 

So, there has been this development. Then metaphysics came into the picture 150 years ago, and what it did was to uncover just how close the imminence of God was because everyone could connect God "as the infinite Mind" with themselves "as mind." And they could grasp that perhaps what was fouling everything up was the thinking they were indulging in that God never did indulge in. And so, everyone learned that if they thought clearly and intelligently, it made a difference in their lives, a demonstrable difference. But this was still an accommodation.

 

Why did everyone need to learn that? At an experiential level, they needed to learn it so they could see that intelligence, embodied with clarity at the level of mind, had a direct and beneficial effect.

 

Why was that important? Well, if the next step was to yield into the infinite Mind, which is God, where was everyone going to get the courage to do it if their concept of God was one of a loving and wrathful God, one who, by grace, occasionally—not very often, but by grace—blessed them, and at other times inflicted suffering upon them...for their growth. That's the absurd lie or assumption that came out of the fearful ego place.

 

It was only when everyone arrived at a point where they understood not only the singularity of God, but the fact that God was the infinite Mind, that they could dare to abandon their clear, correct thinking or assertion of authority, mentally speaking, and yield into the infinite Mind that God is, which is really everyone's right mind, their Home.

 

Everyone had to know the Nature and character of God by demonstration so that they could arrive at the point of abandoning demonstrating It and yielding into It with trust.

 

By continuing to be able to seem to express authority or dominion over the world, authority over diseases, you cannot arrive at the significant point of abandoning the separated sense of self which up to now has been what was exercising the authority and thereby embodying the truth of God.

 

Now, I have not said, "Embrace disease." The other day, someone asked, and I said, "No, you do not love your problems, and you do not love your illnesses." Indeed, you recognize them to be illegitimate impositions upon the Son of God, but you don't then do something highly metaphysical, with a sense of authority coming from your present sense of yourself, to get rid of it. You recognize that it is an illegitimate imposition upon the Son of God, and then you get into that place where the Son of God that You Are is able to register with you because you are not claiming a separate private vantage point from which to reflect God authoritatively! You see?

 

So, you do not agree with that which is illegitimate and doesn't reflect God. You disagree with it. But not with fear. You just recognize that it doesn't fit, and therefore it must be an illusion. And then, as I said, you let yourself into that place where you have the capacity to recognize the Real meaning, which is the presence of God in that place, and you will see healing. Not because of any authority you have exercised, but because there is really nothing going on there requiring authority to get rid of. And so, you yield into that place where your awareness of God's perfection is apparent to you because you have abandoned a separate vantage point, viewing place, and you are willing to let God's View fill you and be You in your right mind.

 

This is very important, and I am very glad you have asked the question. Because "the times, they are a'changing." Which really means the mental frame of reference is a'changing. It's not as dense as it was. And it's not as elementary as it was, so that one must speak in parables of great simplicity, such as I had to 2,000 years ago.

 

Yes, I do speak in parables today! And I must do it so that what I say relates to your present experience of yourself, but also releases you from it more quickly, with less process to it. It is much easier today, I promise you. Truth does not have to be as "hidden" in order for It to be able to be said without being totally rejected.

 

I thank you again for the question. And everyone who will have the opportunity to hear the answer will say, "Thank you," also.

 

During the latter days of my life 2,000 years ago, I made the following statement: "The works that I do, shall ye do also. And greater works than these, because I go unto the Father." It is an interesting statement, is it not?

 

I want you to be aware that besides the teaching about God, which my life embodied, and the teaching about who man really is which my life embodied, my life, itself illustrated the movement of everyone's process of Awakening. My statement referred to the works that I had done—the instantaneous healing, the giving of the word that was immediately manifest. It is the last part of the phrase that none of you truly understand. It is the first part of the phrase that has strengthened you in the metaphysical aspect of your development.

 

"The works that I do shall ye do also, and greater works than these, because I go unto the Father."

 

What have we been talking about all of these three days? We have been talking about "going unto the Father." That is what "going into the silence" means. Because I went unto the Father and stayed there, and anchored in human consciousness by so doing everything that my life had embodied, everyone had the clearer opportunity to say the word and have it be so, as expression of transformational love called healing. But, everyone must, as I indicated, arrive at the point where they stop "giving the word" from the point of their present sense of themselves and also go unto the Father. That is the significance of that statement. And that is where everyone is now because that's the last step Home, which undoes the separation from the Father.

 

It literally is almost possible for us to say to you all, "Welcome Home!" And we are encouraging those who are still intent upon doing the "works" and the "greater works" to not persist overly long in that stage of their growth, but to let it go. Willingly let it go in favor of going unto the Father. You see, all Paul is doing is "not blocking the door." In Psalms, in the Bible, it says, "Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lift up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in." You are the place where God shines through. That is the function of the Son or Daughter of God. And so, when any of you goes within to Listen, you are being willing to stand as the Door.

 

I am standing as the Door also, with Paul. And it is the Father you hear. And it is the Father you see when you look at Paul when he is standing as the Door. And it is the Father you see when you look at each other, whether you are standing as the Doors or not. But when you are standing as the Doors, the Presence of the Father is what is there to be experienced.

 

When you "go to the Father," you come Home to Who and What You Are. And Who and What You Are is the Father being the conscious Individuality that You Are. And although the words I have to use speak of the Father and what You Are—which sounds like "two"—the experience is an inseparable experience of Unity which has not caused any loss of identity, except that that word "identity" now has an infinitely new Meaning, God.

 

It's not the word "God" that you are. It's the Movement, the conscious experience of the Movement of God that is You. It is you at this moment. You won't graduate into bigness from smallness. You will just discover that the smallness that you thought was real was an illusion. And that will uncover the bigness of you, the wholeness of you that you have always been.

 

So, mankind, as a whole, is at the experiential point of "going to the Father." Why? Why, when you may not be consciously choosing it with commitment? Because there are too few of you committed to dreams to give enough substance to the dreams that the dreams will hold together. The dreams are losing integrity because of the lack of commitment to dreams within the whole Brotherhood. And so, literally—and perhaps exasperatingly—like the laborers in the vineyard, the johnny-come-latelys will wake up along with you, who came early in the morning and labored relative to your Awakening, because there is not enough commitment within the Brotherhood as a whole. There are not enough dreaming dreams with commitment to the dreams to create a sense of integrity to the dream-state.

 

So, what I am sharing with you, and have been sharing with you, is not only that which will help further the breakup of the dreams, but it is also to promote a conscious choice on your part to participate in waking up with conscious volition—by choice—even though the choice, as we have said, involves choosing not to use your will. It is a choice to consciously give up "choices" arrived at from the standpoint of your best reasoning and thinking.

 

So, it is a marvelous time you live in. Not at all like the time 2,000 years ago. And what the Christ says to one who is very close to Awakening is very different from one who is just barely stirring from his dream.

 

I'm going to take this opportunity to address an issue, which is presenting itself, especially with regard to A Course in Miracles. The suggestion is being made that A Course in Miracles is a divine event in the world—a penetration of the dream—which is absolutely unique, relative to nothing else. Even though it is obvious that I am the author from reading it, it is now being suggested that the Jesus of the Course is irreconcilable with the Jesus of the Bible. And I would ask you, "If they are irreconcilable, then why wasn't the Jesus of the Course called Henrietta? Why is there any reference at all to Jesus? Why, in the Course, did I make reference to my disciples or things that I said which are in the Bible?" The reason is, because there is a relationship between the Jesus of the Course and the Jesus of the Bible. And the correspondence establishes what I'm going to call the chain of real Being that unites the centuries—in other words, the belief of time—in the design of God. In other words, in a design that is from outside of time.

 

No matter how well-intentioned the attempt is—because of the great love for the Course that exists in the ones making this suggestion—it is unintelligent to try and make the Christ, who spoke relative to the deep sleep that everyone was in 2,000 years ago, irreconcilable with the same Christ who speaks to those just about to enter Home today.

 

It is essential for all of you to know that there is a relevance, a continuity of the design of God, no matter how much that unitary, unified design of God seems to have been broken up in your consciousness into lifetimes that seem to be absolutely disconnected.

 

I say this because, as we discussed in the last two days, one can, through the use of logic and reason, arrive at a provable postulate that you don't exist. It isn't true, but you can reason your very existence away! And such an exercise is not only useless, it is demoralizing, depressing, and creates for the one who embraces it, misery. And that is not the sign or the evidence of Truth.

 

What makes A Course in Miracles meaningful is that, indeed, it unites the Christ of the Course with the Christ of the Bible, embodying and establishing the uninterruptible unity of the presence of God, and the intent of Those of the Brotherhood Who are Awake to reflect God's Will and stand ready to be the presence of Love that supports each of you as you begin to stir—you, who wish so dearly that you could push a divine snooze button and get ten more minutes sleep, ten more minutes of dreams. Yes, it establishes the intent of those Who will stand there, encouraging you, whatever little willingness you bring to Awakening, and support you in actually rousing totally! It is the fact that the Christ of the Bible and the Christ of the Course are the same Christ which makes the Course of value. It is not creating a concept of the Course as a special instance of divine intervention, which has nothing to do with anything else that makes it important, meaningful or significant.

 

Any book, any book that is written which supports your becoming a fully realized Christ, the fully realized Son or Daughter of God is valuable. But one that triggers in you the awareness that the Christ has been an ever present Presence in the dream, in the human experience, with absolute continuity which illustrates the grand design of God to be a Fact that has never changed, that is real significance! Anyone may believe whatever they want to believe. You do not have to believe me. But I am telling you the truth.

*******************************************************************

 

AN OBJECT OF YOUR AFFECTION

 

QUESTION. I've talked to you for a long time about migraines and pain, and while I don't have the pain at this exact moment, I did an hour ago. My desire is to not suffer any more. I realized yesterday that I was afraid of being overwhelmed by God's love, and that there was a feeling of some kind of protection which translated into pain—defensiveness to keep out God's love. When I realized that, I realized that I wanted to be overwhelmed by God's love.

 

Today, having given permission to receive more—like a stronger experience of God's love—I noticed that I crimped...I crimped the movement of the love. I don't want to continue doing it, and would like to know how not to crimp.

 

RAJ: Well, what are you crimping? The only thing that you can crimp or block, really, is the presence of God. In layman's terms that means that you are blocking the flow of the Love that you are by virtue of being the presence of the Movement of Love that God is. So, the key to uncrimping the flow is to extend it, to find ways to express love.

 

QUESTION: I feel foolish, but when I get in that place, I don't know how to do that.

 

RAJ: You need to do that before you get into that place, and you won't get into that place. But I know, you want help when you have forgotten and you have crimped and you are beginning to be uncomfortable.

 

It's simple, but difficult. The "call," when you are beginning to feel the onset of the pain, is to value being in that place where you are not blocking your love more than you value reacting to the pain and the promise of greater pain which the initial stages seem to provide. There really needs to be, at that very moment, a commitment to stopping whatever you're doing and becoming still.

 

No matter what any of you think, your peace is as absolutely and as easily available to you when you are experiencing pain as when you are not. And whatever method of meditation any of you use to become centered and move into your peace functions as efficiently when you are in pain as when you are not. The key element is making a decision within yourself in favor of your peace and your desire to extend the love that is present there in the peace. You must value that more than you value the fear of the greater and greater pain that you anticipate is coming because historically it always has.

 

This means more than just somehow becoming filled with feelings of love. There must be an object of your affection. There must be an object of the extension of your love. And I don't care whether it's a room you've just cleaned which is immaculate and beautiful, or an object on your desk, or a flower in your garden. You must consciously engage in the act of love.

 

We have talked about what love is over the past few weeks, and that it is the willingness to recognize that which is Real in each and every thing. So, when you look at a job that you have done well, and you appreciate the job—and yourself—that is an expression or extension of love, a letting flow of the love that is in you to express. The fact that you recognize beauty in what you are looking at is an act of willingness to recognize what is Real there even if to you it seems to be a very surface recognition of physical order or physical beauty in which you are not at that moment having any concept of God at all, or awareness of God there. But, it is a start. It is the means by which you break the sense of isolation, which is really what does the crimping. Isolation is separation, being exclusive of That which is the very Reason you exist.

 

Then, once you have acknowledged the beauty of a thing or appreciated something that you see in a surface cursory sort of manner, if you will then be quiet with that thing, having a conscious desire to recognize what is divinely Real right there where that thing is, that is the way you give further permission to yourself, by virtue of curiosity, to have the experience of the deeper Meaning of that thing. This is when the recognition of what is Real occurs and the fullness of your love becomes the fullness of God's expression of love which is your ultimate Nature. I promise you that if you do this, whatever pain you are feeling will be gone.

 

Isn't it an interesting concept that one might be afraid to experience God's love? Usually what everyone is afraid of is experiencing the wrath of God—God's judgment upon you—because it seems inevitable to you that God will see you the way you are seeing yourself! And, of course, you know all the shitty little things you've done—the hurtful, thoughtless, unkind things that you, from time to time, have done—for which you judge yourself heavily.

 

Do you know what? God practices what I told you to practice. God insists on recognizing what is Real in each and every thing, including you. And your piss-ant little negative self-image is not the choice He makes for recognizing you. He sees His beloved Son or Daughter right there.

 

On the other hand, there is some "truth" to the fear of God's love, because if you let yourself experience God's recognition of your innocence...well, you're going to have to give up your conscious practice of guilt. And do you know what? Most of you identify with guilt. In other words guilt is almost inseparable from who you think you are. Overcoming the guilt and proving your innocence is the challenge that keeps your tiny separated sense of self invigorated and active. Therefore, God's love would overwhelm your tiny sense of yourself and prove it and its sense of life-purpose to be nothing! And so, at the bottom line, all of you are afraid of losing that which has given you a sense of self-worth—the years of effort and struggle to overcome your guilt and prove your innocence and become respectable in the world. That is a seemingly great cost to have to pay. And as I've said before, it's all bull-shit. It's not natural to you. It's not natural to you!

 

Unfortunately, even the churches have taught that you are guilty at birth, by virtue of your parents' sin. It is sad! Because it is so utterly false. And for any of you to go through life with an underlying feeling of guilt or sinfulness which you had no opportunity to avoid, even at the outset, that's a verdict placed upon you which is so outrageously unkind and hateful that not one of you should be tolerating it for a moment!

 

I'm telling you that at no point has it been true, and that the only reason any of you have ever engaged in actions which could have been called sinful or worthy of a verdict of guilty is because there was such dejection about being a sinner that you just grabbed for your good any old way you could get it, because something in you told you that you were worthy of good.

 

Well, that "something" in you was the God in you, was the Sane part of you. You all have felt like it's the rebellious part of you. And, of course, to be a rebel is itself, another one of those things that makes you guilty.

 

To give yourself permission to let God's love register with you, and to give it permission to register with you by virtue of your extending it to your world by having a place for it to go, reestablishes the flow, uncrimps the flow. And then you don't feel the pain of blocking your Function, blocking your innocence. And that's what it's all about.

 

I know that almost every one of you in this room in the last few weeks seems to have been confronted with major justifications for practicing judgment. In other words, withholding your love. "He doesn't deserve it." "She doesn't deserve it." "Look at what he or she has done. I can't love that!" "I must block, withhold love, so that they might learn a lesson." And you're the one who gets the headache! Or the gut-ache. Or the backache. Or the exhaustion that comes from blocking the Movement of God, which you can't stop, but which you can wear yourself out trying to.

 

Do you know what? If your salvation lies in your innocence then so does everyone else's. And the "call" is not a judgment call, but a call for a willingness to recognize the innocence of everyone, knowing that the things which make them appear to be guilty are a result of their unreasonable attempts to grab their good, steal their good, because they are buried under this edict of sinfulness, of guilt which they never had a chance to be free of from Day One. So there is a call for compassion. And you need to do to everyone in your experience what I am doing to you. Confront them, instead, with their divinity, their guiltlessness—no, their innocence.

 

Innocence is such a beautiful word. Innocence brings forth the well-established image of the lamb—white, fleecy coat. Innocence also brings forth the white of a beautiful wedding gown. Interesting? You can't wear one of those if you've had sex! If you've had sex, you've lost your innocence, and your child is doomed to a life of sin because of the sin of the parents. It is so atrocious!

 

All of you recognize that image and have feelings about it, even though "the times, they are a'changing," and women who are six months pregnant walk down the aisle in a white wedding gown. Bravo! But that's one individual whose attitude probably doesn't reflect her parents' attitude, or even the majority of those in attendance at the wedding. Everyone else needs to make that shift of perception about themselves, and then about each other on a daily basis.

 

Now, for the last few weeks, we haven't had a "practice." But I'm going to give you something to do this week, and that is: No matter how difficult it is, I want you to try to recognize or be willing to recognize the innocence of everyone who comes into your experience who, out of habit, you would feel yourself called upon to judge as being guilty and unworthy of your extension of love. And I want to open next Tuesday talking about what that has been like for you and, perhaps, what wonderful things have resulted from it.

 

The extension must come. You can't love alone! Love is the recognition of that which is Real...no, that's not the end of the sentence...in each and every thing. A connection must occur. A relationship, if you will. A joining with an intent to recognize innocence!

 

Now, this answer is going on and on, but I'm going to continue a little longer.

 

Does this mean that when someone is acting like an ass-hole, you are going to say, "I love you anyway. I recognize you are innocent—no reason for you to change your behavior. You can continue acting like an ass-hole, and I pass no judgment on the meaning of that word, 'ass-hole.'"

 

If someone is behaving in a way that doesn't reflect his innocence, then you know there must be a confusion there. But if you know he is innocent, you will not join with him in accepting his behavior. You won't disagree with his behavior because of judgment, but because you know his behavior is stemming from a misunderstanding which he is suffering from. He is not experiencing his innocence or his behavior would be different. And so, you might find yourself being called upon to say, in so many words, "You know, there's a different way to look at this. You don't have to be uptight. You don't have to be in a state of reaction. Together let's try looking at this a different way."

 

And so, you become engaged in a very real way with another...in a helpful way. And when he says, "Who the hell do you think you are? Get out of here. Get out of my face," well, you ask yourself, "Does this reflect a state of mind that recognizes its innocence? Of course not. And so I will persist gently, kindly, lovingly in not joining with him (or her) at the level of his apparent attack and telling him, 'Well, to hell with you, then. I will leave."' You won't do that. That would be joining with that one's guilt and confirming it.

 

Do you realize that the willingness to recognize what is Real in something means being willing to be "present with" it, rather than separating yourself from it—excluding yourself from it, or excluding it from you? There's the crimp! There's the pain.

 

You know, it isn't even so much the words you use. It's the fact that his behavior doesn't scare you which helps him not to be scared by his very own inner reaction which has come out in the form of a judgment or attack or proof of a great fear he's experiencing. It's when it doesn't scare you that he has the real opportunity to recognize that maybe he doesn't have to be scared either. And maybe if he stood with you in your "not being afraid," he could have the strength to feel his peace and then take another look and see this a different way.

 

"Oh, but this takes time, and I have so much to do!" (Sound of a tightening vise around neck.) (Sound of a tightening vise around head.) And there goes the "crimp" again. Do you know what, though? If you don't crimp up, if you refuse to engage in judgment—reaction to his reaction—you will be in your peace. And because it is your intent to express love rather than reaction, you will be in that place where you will know when it is appropriate to finally be quiet and leave. But, it will be because it's so utterly appropriate, rather than as a reaction and a judgment on your brother or sister, or cat or dog, or garden. And so, you won't end up being "present with" your brother forever, solving his problem, because wisdom will be present with you also. And you will know when to stop or when to persist.

 

"Well, what do I do when I have 'good works' to do for my community and I told them I would be there for them? Is this one who is in front of me more worthy of my love than so many more people in my community that I'm supposed to be there for? I gave my word I would be there for them. It is my cause, my calling." Well, the one who is in front of you at any given moment is your "community." It's what's on the table, if you will. And, do you know what?—and after this I will stop—whatever is on your table is not there by chance! It's there because there is a God, and because this is exactly the opportunity to extend the love, which it is your Nature to be. And the sooner you say okay to it, the sooner you'll be through, and taking care of the community, until there is another "one" in front of you, who might be the grocery clerk or the woman in the post office.

 

So, that's our practice for the next week for anyone who cares to participate. 1. Let there be a focus, an object of your affection, 2. your willingness to extend love, and, 3. then recognize what is Real right there. Why? To hold that one as innocent—fundamentally and absolutely innocent. Then dare to love that one enough to hang in there on behalf of the innocence until the reaction which caused his ass-hole behavior dissolves, yields to the truth.

 

There will be a lot of absolutely wonderful realization, which will occur...about you, and about your world.

***********************************************************************

 

DOING OR NOT-DOING

 

QUESTION: We were talking about control, and authorizing one's own life, and then lack of control on the other side of the coin. And I guess where I would like more discernment is: When is "doing" appropriate, because otherwise we can carry it to the other extreme and say, "Well, I'm just going to sit here in peace and not do, not do." So, when are there instances when we can say, "Well, you know, this feels good. I'll do this"? Is it just the feeling of it, or is it that we're not moving out of need or fear but there's a natural attraction to do something? You know, I've been fooled by that too, where there's a natural attraction to do something and it turns out to be based on some kind of a security issue. Do you see the crux of the question?

 

RAJ: Oh, indeed! Things really are very simple. You will sit there "doing nothing" until you get uncomfortable in some way. And then you will give your attention to that, and you will feel a movement, a need, an attraction to address it. This will once again connect you with reality—I'm not saying whether it has a capital "R" or not.

 

Remember when I spoke of the list on the bathroom wall? I said, "Write down on it what you need," not the money to get what you need. Need is always relevant, like the birth of a baby or the coming of a bowel movement. It's something that's obvious, and it's something that attention needs to be given to. And when you give your attention to it, you know what to do. And what do you do? You let it happen! You let it happen. You let it emerge—am I being too graphic? But you get the point.

 

Just prior to the indicator of emergence, you may have been sitting there contemplating what to do in your life, and when the first indicators of this emergence occurred, you might have said, "Oh, botheration! Why now? I felt like I was so close to grasping my purpose, or what it was I needed to do."

 

You see, it isn't about "doing" or "not-doing." It's about paying attention to the obvious. And then, when the obvious is in your face, instead of interpreting it out of old habit and concepts and old trainings, etc., if you listen for the Movement, feel for the Movement of the fulfillment that negates the need, you will know what to do and you will do it—not out of reaction to lack, but because you're "present with" the Movement.

 

What is a "question"? It's the leading edge of an answer. What is a "need"? It's the leading edge of fulfillment as it moves into your range of awareness. Being, existing, is itself the Movement of fulfillment. And so, when you hear a statement to the effect that "you need do nothing," it means that an outward action isn't what's called for, but a willingness to be "present with" the need, which is the leading edge of the fulfillment—which has gotten your attention because the fulfillment is entering your experience—and being with that movement.

 

So, there will be what you would call "much activity"—not to make something happen, but to keep up with what is happening. And, again, it's so important for what are thought of as "metaphysical principles" or "truths" not to be thought of as irrelevant to your daily life. Whatever the need is, whatever the uncomfortableness is that causes you to give your attention to something relevant and obvious is, as I said earlier, no accident. What's on the plate is no accident. The one who's in your experience, so that you may look in his face and remember God, is no accident! It's no accident that there is a need that Jim asked about by saying, "Speak to me about employment." And we don't get rid of the need. We sit with it. We abide with it. We allow ourselves to be present with it because it's the leading edge of the fulfillment coming into view.

 

That certainly is going to involve a readiness and an alertness for action! And just as surely as you know what to do when a bowel movement is coming, you will know what to do as the fulfillment comes further into view. And you will do it because it's so obvious what needs to be done. You won't participate in it because it's a remedy for something, or it's going to save you, but because there just isn't anything else to do. And along with that recognition will be a feeling of congruence with the fulfillment that is happening, and therefore it won't seem to be happening to you. You and it will be moving together. And you will feel the unity of it, the groundedness of it, and the integrity of it.

 

Integrity: Whenever I use that word, "integrity," I mean it in the sense of "structural integrity"—tight, no rattling nuts and bolts, nothing about to fall off—integrated, whole. Secure in its wholeness.

 

So again, it's not about "doing" or "not-doing." It's about yielding to the movement by virtue of having let your metaphysics or spirituality be relevant to where you are.

 

You were with me in Melbourne, where I said, "What do you think you're going to become enlightened about?" You're going to become enlightened about all of this [motioning to everything around], everything you've already been familiar with. Don't conceptualize enlightenment as that which is going to lift you above and beyond everything that you're already familiar with. It may embrace far more than you're already familiar with, but it isn't going to exclude what you're already familiar with. And so you might as well let everything you're familiar with be the "call" for the willingness to see the more that is there than what you are currently seeing. Do it with things, and do it with people. Find the innocence of that table—the purity of the intent God has in keeping that table recognizable at this instant—or your partner, or your children.

 

Always be willing to look at any situation—even "doing" or "not-doing"—with a recognition that there is a different way to look at this: "I don't have to be so darned confident that the way I am perceiving it is the way it truly and wholly and completely is."

 

So, when do you know whether to "do" or "not to do"? When you are willing to be real enough and present enough with the actual situations and circumstances that confront you—with a willingness to look at them to find God in them rather than your current definitions—and then flowing with the movement that's felt. To be present with your world does not mean the opposite of being on your spiritual path any more than the act of sex causes you to lose your innocence.

*********************************************************************

 

THE HEAT IS ON

 

As you may have noticed since the last time we were together, and even more specifically, during the last two weeks, "the heat is on." I want to provide a picture, however, that will perhaps equalize or balance out your experience of "the heat being on."

 

Imagine, if you would, a packet of seeds sitting in a rack in a nursery, and the packet has been there for six or eight months. And the seeds inside are having an experience of nothing in particular. Then one day a lady comes in and picks the packet up, takes it home, sticks the seeds in the ground and waters them. All of a sudden, the seeds are beginning to absorb the moisture and swell, and changes in their structure begin to occur beyond just swelling. They begin to "become" something that wasn't apparent in the seeds alone. This movement, this process of change, from the seed's point of view, could be called "the heat's on." You see?

 

It isn't that it's hot. It isn't that something is happening to you circumstantially. It is, however, that a movement within you, that is becoming more than you had experienced yourself to be, is happening. So, do not become distracted by the events external to you which seem to be identifiable as the cause of your "misery," or the demand for you to "cope."

 

The seeds could blame the lady. The seeds could blame the water. The seeds could blame the earth; that it wasn't porous enough to let the water be drawn away from them, etc. They could blame it on the weather. But the point is that something's happening to the seeds. And something is happening not only to all of you, but to everyone everywhere. One could say, "Oh, well, it's the planets!" No, the planets are just reflecting "what" is going on. They are not causing it.

 

Now, at the bottom line, "the heat being on," the push that is being felt, the demand that everyone for the most part is identifying as uncomfortable, is a demand for the very thing that we have been talking about since the first time we got together in this house on a Tuesday evening. I'm telling you this so you will understand what the "call" is for, what the demand is for, so that you will not become overburdened and frustrated by a misperception of what is called for and an attempt to correct it by dealing with what will not correct it.

 

It's really very simple. It is a call for making a choice between love and hate. It is a call to abandon judgment, and look with new and innocent eyes. It is not by chance that we have been speaking about love and innocence and having an object of your affection so that the love gets expressed. It was no accident that we were speaking about these things for a number of weeks, because that's what there is a very real call for which is going on now, and will continue to increase.

 

You may say, "Oh, you mean we're going to have increasingly hard times?" No. You are going to have the increasing opportunity to make a choice for love. Why? Because that is your Nature. And what is happening here is a demand for your Nature to be less covered than It has been before. Less covered to the world? Maybe. But less covered to you. Because when you are not feeling your capacity to love and the conscious choice to express it, you are not feeling at Home. You're not feeling Natural—and I'm going to say divinely Natural, really Natural.

 

Now, I've said it before: Everyone is going to wake up! And the more there are in the Brotherhood—whether incarnated on your planet or not—who are not Awake but are engaging in inviting Awakening, the more difficult it will be for everyone else to remain unconscious of who they are, to remain unconscious of the experience of being Normal, really Normal.

 

So, the seeds blame it on the water, but what's happening is that they are germinating, isn't it—in a state of becoming more than they appeared to be? And that is what is happening to everyone. If you understand this, then you can engage in embracing the real call. And the real call is to dare to come out of the closet and be the presence of Love in the marketplace, on the street, in your kitchen, at your work.

 

Now, this doesn't mean that you will hug everyone. But it means that you will—what have we been talking about?—refrain from or withdraw the practice of judgment. That's love. That is going to bring you to a point of equilibrium within yourselves which will illuminate to you more clearly your real Nature, which is really what this is all about. It's all about You.

 

And it will also bless everyone else, causing everyone else to realize that they don't have to be as heavily defended as they thought they had to be—that they can begin to relax into a less defended stance wherein the opportunity to discover their capacity to love will be increased. This is what it's about, and it is this utterly simple.

 

What you need to understand is that there's no going back. There's no way, once the seeds have germinated, that they will ever be able to get back into that packet, dry and safe, in the nursery on the rack. And if you really understand that, then you'll get down to the business of making the choice daily, momentarily—even if it's the hardest thing to do because you haven't been doing it before and it doesn't feel natural—to dare to see the innocence of those you are with, and to refrain from practicing judgment, and express simple Integrity.

 

If you do this, the germinating and growing process will be felt as a most desirable and graceful and harmonious thing. And if you lag behind, it will feel like pressure, and the pressure will cause you to try to cope with external things "which are to blame." But ultimately, when that doesn't work, you will come back to the point where you will say, "How am I using my mind? Am I using it for a purpose that I have imagined, that I have created? Or am I using it for the Purpose God created it for?" And then, because making the wrong choice is uncomfortable, you will willingly make the right choice...at least for awhile.

 

I'm sharing this with you so that now, as the heat has been turned up, so to speak, you can start, "from the beginning," flowing with the movement of growth that's really happening, and facilitate it by not resisting it—not resisting it by denying that it's you "becoming." Not resisting it by saying, "It's something out there," that it is the circumstance. No, it's your opportunity to see the circumstance from the vantage point of love—the willingness to see its innocence.

 

Now, I just wanted to share that with you as we began this evening, because I know for many of you the heat has seemed intense.

 

QUESTION: Who's turning up the heat? What is the action and reaction here?

 

RAJ: Literally, it is the numbers of individualities who have been dreaming dreams, who are choosing to begin to Awaken. And in their withdrawal from participating in the mutual agreement to dream dreams, those who are still dreaming are finding it to be more difficult. It takes a lot of mutual agreement to do something, which is unnatural and feel some degree of comfort around it.

 

Again, you must remember that it isn't just those who are incarnated on the planet at this moment who are dreaming dreams. Those who have passed on and have not engaged in their process of Awakening are still dreaming dreams also. And so, as the "collective Brotherhood" as a whole becomes less dense because more and more are abandoning dreams, those who are still remaining in dreams are finding it more difficult to remain asleep. That means, then, that more of Reality begins to feel present in them. And that's like the little germ in the seeds that begins to assert itself, you might say, and begins the transformational process which is natural to the seed.

 

So, it isn't something being applied by a conscious choice [or intent] to evoke a certain response in those who are sleeping. It is the inevitable result of too few individualities, present and joined together in mutual agreement, to make it easy for the remaining dreamers to continue to sleep, to remain unaware of the divine kernel of their Being.

************

 

QUESTION: I have been pursuing, since the beginning of the year, a business called Heart Search, and there seem to have been a number of unexpected roadblocks that appeared—or waiting periods. It feels like I'm still on the right track and am to continue with doing this business, and I'm just asking for your insight onto this.

 

RAJ: You are feeling correctly. It is appropriate to persist—gently and patiently. You need to let the bigness of this movement create the space in which it can be fully identified.

 

The inner movement of the seed might well find the shell of the seed a "block," and once having penetrated it, it might find that a pebble or a small rock is another "block." But if it does not panic, and it lets the growth continue that it can't avoid being the presence of, it will either move around the pebble or it will move the pebble, and it will indeed break surface and become visible and grow into what it is in its Wholeness. So, gentleness and patience, here.

 

Your feeling that it is appropriate to persist is not ridiculous or stupid or wishful thinking.

************

 

QUESTION: I have created, in the space in which I live, eleven image boards, and they surround me. And...

 

RAJ: For the sake of everyone else, what are "image boards"?

 

QUESTION: Image boards are pictorial affirmations that I have created from magazines and pictures, and they address probably every area of my life. And they surround me in my entire room. I've been affirming to them at least twice a day for about two and a half months. And when you say...whatever it was you said earlier...it's like a massive explosion happening for me at this point. They're really moving me. I'm not sure what the question is. I just wonder if you have any comment about them.

 

RAJ: Well, what you are expressing here is something everyone else is having trouble expressing, too. And it really amounts to a sense of loss of identity in the midst of change, and the feeling that without that sense of identity, chaos will result. Yet, there is something saying, "Everything is all right." And so, there is this "conflict" of a "grasping for a clearer sense of identity" (and therefore better control) and this unreasonable inner assurance that in this movement and loss of identity, you're all right.

 

It's like, again, the seeds. For months they were in that little envelope, and for months they were perfectly identifiable. And if, on the outside of the package, it said, "Tomato Plant," those seeds inside—which had an enduring identity while they were inside—looked nothing like tomato plants. And so, when the germination occurs, and the growth and change and transformation occurs, they lose their identity as seeds, and don't yet know what they are becoming. Yet, with every single seed, the process of transformation is orderly and inevitable.

 

Indeed, movement is really happening! Your affirmations, your boards, have helped you be in harmony with this movement that is occurring. They have helped you be ready for it. Now that it is occurring, don't panic. And remember to look on everything with innocent eyes—with the absence of judgment and the willingness to see what it Really is.

 

You are safe.

 

I'm going to put it this way: You are safely "in process."

***********

 

QUESTION: I'd like you to help me to let go even further into what's going on, and maybe confirm for me what has been happening—as to the appropriateness of it. I'm a little confused, but I'm trying to yield as best I can.

 

RAJ: Thank God for the "little bit of confusion," because it's the weakness in everyone's defenses, always. It's the absence of confidence. It's the absence of that which blocks transformation.

 

QUESTION: Okay, then I'm very confused. (Group laughter.)

 

RAJ: Great.

 

QUESTION: No. I know I'm still in the way. But if you could help me on anything I need to hear particularly to get even more out of the way...

 

RAJ: What you must remember is that the more your prior sense of yourself gets out of the way, the more present your Self is. I say that so that as there is more presence to you—I mean by that, literally, the presence of appropriateness in the world—as that emerges, you must be careful not to squelch its movement or activity because you think you're supposed to be "out of the way."

 

You are tending to refrain from actions which come with some motivation—which is not ego motivation—for fear that because it's an action "in the world," it will necessarily have to be an ego action. And so, I want you to remember that the less "in the way" your sense of yourself is, the more present You will be. That is the key point for you for this coming week. That will be on your plate.

 

It is very much like someone who becomes still so that he can Listen to Guidance, and when the Guidance is experienced, because it is going on in his mind, he squelches it, because he wants to be quiet enough to hear. Do you see? One becomes still, but then one must allow the movement of the experience of Hearing, which does go on in one's mind. And so, again, as your prior accumulated sense of who you are is allowed to be out of the way, there will be the movement of the presence of You emerging. Don't squelch it.

 

During this coming week, I want you to just pay attention to discern the difference between the emerging presence of You and the old sense of yourself that you called "you." By quietly observing and noticing—being in a state of attentiveness and noticing—you will begin to be able to tell the difference. And as you are able to tell the difference, you will begin to be able to consciously align yourself with this clearer presence of You. Let this be your "practice" for the coming week.

 

QUESTION: Thank you.

 

RAJ: You are welcome.

 

[To everyone.] I'm going to interject something here: Just because the heat is on, just because movement is occurring, just because you are all having the opportunity to choose between love and hate, doesn't mean you have to be really serious. Just because something really is happening and really is meaningful doesn't mean that you've got to be really serious. And so, I want all of you to remember to laugh. Even if you have to turn on the Comedy Channel and force a few laughs out of yourself, do it! It helps to break the mesmerism of constantly focusing on something, even if it's something worthwhile. It helps to keep you open and receptive in many directions. You do not want to become so seriously intent on this movement which is happening that you narrow down your attentiveness and your willingness to respond to Life.

 

Remember to laugh!

************

 

QUESNON: Raj, I wonder if there's something specific you could say to me about the fact that even though I've heard from other people's Guides that I'm hearing my Guide clearly, in the last few months I haven't felt that I am. It's as though what I was hearing before, which sounded like a clear voice, doesn't come up any more. And it's been very disturbing for me. I can hear, "I'm here," but that's about it. Is there something you could say that might help the situation for me?

 

RAJ: I want you to remember that your talking with your Guide does not have to be a public matter. The simplest way I can put it at the moment is: For the time being, talk to your Guide "in secret." I simply mean by that, let it be an utterly intimate communion between the two of you. You may still talk with other people's Guides through them, but enjoy the simple [private] intimacy of you talking with your Guide, even if it is only a few words here and there.

 

There is a tendency on your part, because of how fluently everyone else is managing to talk to their Guides, to feel that you ought to be talking that fluently yourself, and that there is something wrong with the fact that you aren't. Judgment is coming in, and a false sense of obligation for it to be something more than it is, or different from what it is. And that is why I am saying: Let it just be between the two of you, and let the intimate bond of union be experienced. And let go of the feeling that it must be more than it is.

 

If you say something and your Guide says, "I'm here," drink in whatever meaning that conveys. Don't say, "Gee, I only got two words." What you got was communion. What you got was the experience that you're not alone! What you got was a communication of love that is uninterruptible, because if you ask that question every millisecond and get that answer every millisecond, you will find that there is never a time when your Guide is unavailable. The devotion to you by your Guide is forever! And so, if you hear only the words, "I'm here," you are getting an experience of unending communion. You are having an experience of it. And so, it's much more than two words.

 

You need to relax some and let this become simpler for you. Let go of the idea that "being in touch with your Guide" equals "getting profound answers." Let go of that for the time being and at the least, let the words "I'm here" remind you that you're not alone. Do you know what? That's more profound than anything else. It's more profound than any exotic metaphysical declaration of Truth. Just nurture that ongoing experience of Hearing "I'm here."

 

You are creating discomfort for yourself by watching others and thinking, "That's what I'm supposed to be doing." Well, there no "supposed to be doing" anything! You need to let your experience of communion be utterly original, else your expectation that what you will hear will be like what you have heard from others will cause your Listening to be biased. And the freshness and the simplicity and the honesty and the practicality of what your Guide will say to you will be lost, or colored by this preexisting expectation. In some ways it would be better if you didn't know that anyone else in the world had ever had this experience, because then you would explore the experience without preconceptions. That's what you want to bring back to the experience—the innocence of your participation in it. And that's what will help to open this back up for you.

************

 

QUESTION: ...[Just beginning to speak.]

 

RAJ: [Interrupting.] So the heat is "burning your ass."

 

QUESTION: [Laughing] Me in particular, do you mean?

 

RAJ: You in particular. [Group laughter.]

 

QUESTION: Oh, no! Well, maybe that's the answer to my question.

 

RAJ: You will find in the Bible a reference to the "balm of Gilead." And I will tell you that what will heal those "blisters" faster than anything else is the balm of Gilead. And the balm of Gilead is genuine unconditional love, felt by you, which will embrace you and soothe those blisters and heal them quickly, and remove what seems to be the justification for anger and judgment.

 

Gentle, kind movements of love within you (and everyone) are what will heal the "burn" and soften the heart and reveal to you your birthright of Joy. But it does take a conscious choice, and it always works! And, you deserve the experience. You do not deserve the pain. What I mean by that is that you do not deserve the pain of self-righteousness—even though it feels so good sometimes. It's not your Birthright.

 

QUESTION: But how does one go from feeling self-righteous to feeling inspired to being anything else?

 

RAJ: One is seldom inspired out of self-righteousness.

 

QUESTION: [With pseudo sarcasm] Really. Tell me about it.

 

RAJ: One almost inevitably departs from self-righteousness because it hurts so much, and the expected payoff never comes.

 

QUESTION: So, exhaustion, in other words.

 

RAJ: Exhaustion. Or really good friends who won't join you, and who will remind you, and who will be there for you when you are awkward.

 

QUESTION: So that's why I've been so tired for a week?

 

RAJ: That is it exactly.

 

QUESTION: Thank you.

 

RAJ: Now, you must realize that the self-righteousness has been a reaction to the heat being on—not to the circumstances, which your ego claimed were the cause. Everything that occurs can be interpreted falsely. Everything can become justification for anger. An absolutely gorgeous flower can really piss someone off when he or she feels ugly. Do you see?

 

Don't forget: No matter what the specifics are, at this time when the heat is on, when the growth is "growing," it is a call to decide for one of two things: love or hate.

 

You will find that even in spite of any self-righteous satisfaction that you are "going for," there will always be a part of you available to think intelligently—to reason, in other words—and to remember, "there is another way to look at this." The minute you remember that there's another way to look at this, you will remember that there's a different way to feel than the way you're feeling, and then you will be in a position to shift.

 

Now, you could look at Art and say, "No, I have a real reason to be pissed off. Art's reasons? They're nothing! I mean, I could deal with them. They're nothing." And somebody else can look at you and say, "Yours are nothing. I could deal with them. They wouldn't bother me a bit." Do you see?

 

The fact is that none of your reasons are real. Again: They are always the demand—I earlier said "opportunity/demand," but they are really the demand—to make a choice for the use to which you're going to put your mind. One that's going to cause you misery or one that's going to bring you bliss. That's really all there is to it!

 

[To everyone] I do want to give everyone a practice for this coming week. I want you to do your best, when you feel yourself becoming reactive, to make a spontaneous decision to shift to love. It doesn't have to be reasonable. In fact, the more often you can do it without any reason for it, the better off you'll be. If you will do this, you will find that you don't have to go through some great process to escape from the bondage of your suffering. And you will discover that you can very quickly shift from all of the turmoil, from the feeling of pressure, whatever it might be—of the "heat being on"—into feelings and expressions of love for no good reason!

 

This will be very emancipating for all of you. And I don't just mean emancipating during this coming week. It is going to make significant difference in the way you will experience and deal with "the rest of your life"—a very simple little thing, uncomplicated, because it doesn't have to be reasonable.

 

Try this, and let's talk about what happened next week.

***********************************************************************

 

THE CALL FOR LOVE

 

Well we had a practice this past week. Was there anyone here who did the practice and who would care to report what the experience was?

 

QUESTION: What I found, Raj, was that I became aware of how I felt about people. You know, just the initial feeling that I had when I came across someone. And what I found was that if I was in discord with someone, I could waylay that and seemingly put that aside. But there seemed to be a resistance to actually love them—to replace that with love—as if it was being too vulnerable. So, what I found is, I kept running up against this resistance throughout the entire week when I was conscious of it.

 

RAJ: There is a difference between loving people and being love. The result [of being love] feels like being loved by those who are in your presence, but, you see, it is the picture you hold of another in your mind that blocks you from, or brings into play the resistance to love.

 

If you realize that the call is for you to be the presence of love and not squelch it in you, regardless of the other person, then you will not find the resistance present. And so, you will feel the love that abides in you awaiting expression and it will be expressed—not because you are trying to communicate it to another, but because you are not bringing into play something other than love called judgment. When another is with you, and you are not practicing judgment, they feel safe. And they feel loved.

 

So, I'm not going to give this practice to everyone again this week, but I am going to give it to you, Warren. I'm going to ask you to do the same thing again, and forget about loving them, and instead, stay in touch with the presence of love that is You, and feel it, because when you are feeling it, judgment will not be there. Then, your behavior in the presence of another will obviously be loving, but your trying to love that person will not be your goal. It is what is present when you have abandoned judgment—within yourself—and said, "I'm going to be in touch with the love that I am."

 

Now, we have talked recently about having an object of your affection. And I realize that that has sounded as though I am saying you are to direct your love to another—to love them. This is where you ran into the problem, Warren, because "them" didn't deserve it.

 

The way in which another becomes the object of your affection, rather than the object of your judgment, is that in the moment that you're with them, they become the reason that you choose to be in touch with your love. They are not the reason you choose to love them. You use them as the reason for abandoning judgment in favor of your Nature, which is love. You use them as the reason for being in touch with your Self. And then, in being in touch with the love that you are, just because it feels good, just because at the bottom line it is really what is Natural to you, the fact is that they will feel loved. Not because you took them as an object "out-there" to direct your love toward, but because you took them as a trigger to your remembering to be in touch with the love that you are. That's the way they become the object of your affection.

 

This might be considered to be a fine point—perhaps complicated, and not natural. But I will tell you that your tendency and your inclination to shoot your love out through space to envelop another and make him or her feel good, is a complicated idea. It involves an effort that you can succeed or fail at, and then it becomes a test all the time. But for you to abandon judgment, for you to say, "I'm not going to engage any degree of hate, and instead, I'm going to be in the quiet place within me where the love I am is present for me to feel, where my capacity to appreciate is present for me to feel," that is natural and simple. And it is the way you begin to unlock your capacity to experience the one who is in front of you, or the thing that is in front of you, or the universe that is in front of you, with less distortion.

 

I've said before that love is the willingness to recognize that which is Real in each and every thing. And the way you "be willing" to recognize that which is Real is to disengage from judgments and definitions which you have all developed throughout your lives about what everything is. So, love is really "standing in that place within yourself where the only thing that is present is the love that constitutes your Nature," and when you are doing that, every one and every thing in your experience feels it—feels it in a transformative way, not just in a gooey, soft romantic way—because they can recognize wordlessly that there's no game-playing to it, that it's genuine.

 

So, I encourage you, this coming week, to approach it in this way. I want you to observe the difference in your experience as compared to this past week. And the other thing I want you to do is to watch the other person, and see if their behavior changes. See if there are any indicators that you can pick up on that their ease at existing, or their ease with being in that moment when they are with you, is different from what it would have been if you had employed judgment, or tried to love in the way that you did this past week.

************

 

QUESTION: When I was practicing switching to love, I felt the fight leave me, and I felt more relaxed and kind of confused a bit at times, because it was like, "Well, now what?" You know? Like, I'm not fighting any more. I'm not seeing the fight in somebody else. And it became more peaceful.

 

ANSWER. Did you find out what came next?

 

QUESTION: It seemed that the peace came next.

 

RAJ: And did you find yourself able to be practical or functional "in the world," or in the transaction with whoever you were dealing with?

 

QUESTION: Indeed.

 

RAJ: And so, this experience, or, I'm going to call it a practice of love—it's actually like an "un-practice" of love, because you can't do it. You have to not be doing anything else! This practice of love causes you to be more grounded and more able to be appropriate. It does not cause you to be unable to say "no," when "no" is needed. It is also able to allow you to know when "no" is needed. But not with judgment, just with clarity.

 

Is there anyone else who would like to share before we open this up to general questions—and I do want to say that whether what you would share seems profound or important or not, whatever it is, if it is what happened, will be valuable to everyone.

 

[Short silence.]

 

Erica?

 

QUESTION: You want me to share?

 

RAJ: Indeed.

 

QUESTION: Well, you know, I wrote it down last week, the practice. And I really didn't feel like I was doing it. I didn't really feel like I could switch gears and feel love instead. And so I threw the piece of paper away (laughing), and it has felt better in the last few days. I haven't really been conscious that I'm changing in midstream or anything.

 

RAJ: Why do you think you have felt better?

 

QUESTION: Because I haven't been judging.

 

RAJ: So, you are saying that rather than engaging in a specific practice of switching, a switching was allowed—perhaps by lack of paying attention to energizing anger or judgment?

 

QUESTION: Uh-huh.

 

RAJ: So, this is valuable, too. Because it illustrates that one can specifically choose to abandon judgment, and one can also, perhaps in a nondirective way, neglect to practice judgment. And either way, the result will be the same. You will feel better. You will feel more grounded. You will feel more safe. You will find that you have a greater experience of solidity or strength. And I mean that in the sense of a tree—like a willow tree or like a coconut palm—whose flexible and yet structural integrity allows it to be unbroken by movement around it. And so it is not a muscular strength, but a strength that allows you not to be as easily moved by dynamics around you.

 

To finish up on this subject, for the time being: To make the choice for love, and to do it for no good reason—to just do it—at the moment that you seem called upon to engage in judgment, is not just a good social practice to make society a more pleasant thing to experience. It is more than that.

 

I have said repeatedly that all of you are sitting right in the middle of the Kingdom of Heaven with your eyes all squinched up, saying, "I can't see the Kingdom of Heaven." This practice of love, this practice of abandoning judgment, is the means by which you become curious to see the more of Reality that is present.

 

You see, it still isn't sinking in that if you're right in the middle of the Kingdom of Heaven, the Kingdom of Heaven is the only thing you're experiencing every single day. And because it's the only thing you're experiencing every single day, it is your ever-present opportunity to see it in a new way. It is your ever-present opportunity to unsquinch your eyes. And you unsquinch your eyes so that you can look at everything you've always been seeing more truly, more truly as it is—as the Kingdom of Heaven.

 

I'm talking about God's Kingdom of Heaven! I'm talking about the Kingdom of Heaven that you've read about in the Bible.

 

The way you open yourselves up to it is by loving! Having an object of your affection. Letting whatever is in front of you be the justification or the reason for getting in touch with your love, rather than getting in touch with your definitions of it all, your judgments of it all, your likes and dislikes of it all. All of these things are what are blocking you from discovering the Kingdom of Heaven right here, right now.

 

There really is a transformed experience of everything around you awaiting your conscious awareness of it because it really is the Kingdom of Heaven which all of you are insisting is something else!

 

Most of you have read wonderful spiritual books. The Masters of the Far East, The Celestine Prophecy. You read these books, and you are inspired at the spiritual experiences that seem to be available right here where most everyone you know has never experienced anything like that. And you are inspired—something in you responds and recognizes that those things are true. Well? That kind of inspiration isn't worth much—it's a nice "high”—unless you actually dare to engage with your world in a different way which might actually allow you to have an entirely transformed, marvelously transformed experience of everything that you've dealt with every day of your lives—one that you will wonder why you never tried to experience.

 

Now, I've also said before that this is the Year of the Miracle. This is the year of significant breakthroughs—breakdowns of definitions or ego structures that have bound you to a limited negative polarized experience of the Kingdom of Heaven. And so, if you're going to listen to me on any kind of an ongoing basis, you are going to find me sometimes becoming boringly repetitive. How many ways can I say, "Open your eyes," "Be curious," "Don't wait until after you die to be curious"? After you die, the same thing will be in your face that's in your face now! The Kingdom of Heaven—the Only thing that's going on.

 

Now, don't misunderstand me. I am used to finding millions of ways to say, "Open your eyes." What I want you to understand is that waking up is really simple, and although all of you may study books and teachings, and try to grasp concepts that help release you from your prior limitations, waking up really has nothing to do with "process," "learning," "sorting out," "discarding what is useless," et cetera. I am not saying that those things are not helpful. What I want you to know is that they are not essential!

 

Do you know what? At the end of all of your studying and pulling all of the factors apart and putting them together so that they make sense, the ultimate act you will engage in will be saying, "I choose not to judge. I'm going to shift to love." And you're just going to do it!

 

But, you're really going to do it!

 

It's going to be an interesting year, the rest of this year, because many of you here are going to begin to have transformed experiences of everything, just because you let it be transformed for no good reason.

************

 

QUESTION: Back in the workshop in Princeville, you mentioned that if you really want to drive the ego crazy, ask this question: "Where do I fit in?" And just keep asking it. So, since the workshop in Princeville, I've been asking that question, "Where do I fit in?"

 

I keep the Course in Miracles next to the commode, and I went in to use the commode one morning and sat down and opened the book—well, first I asked the question, "Where do I fit in?" And then I went and opened the book, thinking that the answer might appear, and the lesson that opened was, "My happiness and my function are one" (which seemed appropriate). And then, when you were talking about the "being loved" thing, what I noticed this week was that when I got that answer—it came at the beginning of the week—I started to do things for happiness and for no other reason than saying, "Okay, having a beer right now will make me happy, so I'll have a beer," where I normally might not have a beer ever. Or, "Right now I think I'll just lay down because I feel that will make me happy," or, "I think I'll go to the beach instead of doing a chore because that will make me happy."

 

So, I guess what I'm getting at is: When you talked about love and you brought in the aspect of romantic love, I'm just wondering: to be love, you have to be the feeling. Correct? That's the trick, is to feel the feeling of it. And so it seems to me like happiness is definitely an aspect of it.

 

ANSWIER: Indeed.

 

QUESTION: So, how far to extremes do, you carry this? Again, do you bring judgment in and say, "Well, that's liable to make me happy right now, but tomorrow I'm really going to be upset about being happy. Or it's going to..."

 

RAJ: But you see, if you aren't in touch with your love, you don't know what will make you happy. You will only think you know what will make you happy. It is by virtue of allowing yourself to give up your preconceptions and be in the not-knowing place, that you find yourself where the love is, and then, if you are simply paying attention to what's in your face, you will know what will make you happy. If you pay attention to what is in your face from that place within yourself—the  not-knowing place—then you will know whether you fit there, or how you fit there, and in discovering how to be appropriate in that moment, how you fit in in that moment, you will discover the unity of you and that moment, and it will feel good because there won't be any disturbing distraction there.

 

You are still wanting, perhaps, to provide a little bit of direction to your fulfillment, and to provide a little bit of direction toward your happiness by engaging in certain conscious acts of choice. You're going to have to let go of that. There won't be a conscious act of choice leading to a result that will make you happy or bring you love.

 

When you say, "Where do I fit in?" the only way you can experience the answer to that question is in being quiet enough long enough with what is going on at the moment to feel—just to feel—not knowing ahead of time what the feeling ought to be. When you get the feeling, you're present with what is going on, and you will know, you will experience the choiceless choice of what to do or not to do. And there won't be any act of authority in it at all! But you will experience bliss.

 

I want you to contemplate this.

 

Your question this week is a variation of an earlier question you asked about knowing the difference between "doing" and "not doing."

 

You see, right now, where does Paul fit in? He fits in by not fitting in. He fits in by being completely present. First, he is completely present with me. And then, with me, he/we are completely present with you. And there is no goal. And what he is engaged in, he is not engaged in for the purpose of making himself happy or accomplishing anything. And yet, in spite of the fact that it has become a common experience for him—and I am informing him of this at this moment for the first time—he is having an experience of bliss, because there is, present as his whole experience, a perfect balance of things, perfect equipoise, perfect equilibrium. But it's not an equilibrium all by himself. It's an equilibrium with all of you, in which there is absolute defenselessness and peace—not even self-consciousness as I/he talk(s) about Paul.

 

Now, it isn't about doing or not doing, but is Paul doing or not doing anything at this moment? He certainly is being, isn't he? He certainly isn't in a coma, is he? So, for you, the key lies specifically in being willing to let go of your questions about authority, your conceptualizing queries about the ability to authorize something by some conscious act of choice on your part, because it has nothing to do with being Awake, and it has nothing to do with fitting in. And it has nothing to do with being really You.

 

The ego—everyone's conditioned created sense of who they are—is very curious about anything that has to do with authority, because it exists on the "hit" of authorizing things. And yet that whole process is what blinds you, or keeps you ignorant of the experience of being Who You Really Are.

 

QUESTION: Thank you.

************

 

QUESTION: Raj, last week I had a question that I didn't have a chance to get around to. It deals with allowing. And I have a difficulty just allowing things to happen. I've got to ask "Why?" A lot of times that opens doors, but a lot of times it puts up walls. And I just sometimes don't know how to handle that. Sometimes when it throws up the wall, then I don't enjoy what I could have just allowed to happen. In other words, I've asked too many questions, and I couldn't just accept.

 

RAJ: The problem is that you have forgotten how to play. You have forgotten how to play "Cowboys and Indians," and leap from here to there, even though you never leapt from here to there before. But, because you were playing, you allowed new things to happen.

 

You are very grown up! You are more "grown up" than your mother! [His mother was sitting right next to him.]

 

QUESTION: Oh, God!

 

RAJ: It's obscene! (I say that with a smile on my face.) But it doesn't fit! It's not the way you're supposed to be. You can be intelligent and play, too. Everything doesn't hinge on your ability to be absolutely in control of everything so that you won't fail. That isn't what it's about.

 

Do you know what? You could loosen up fifty percent and you'd still be more grown up than your mother. You don't have to worry about becoming so erratic that you will become dysfunctional by loosening up and playing, loosening up and playing a lot! Because, as I said, if you were actually able to loosen up fifty percent, your mother would still be less grown up than you.

 

What do I mean by that? I mean that she enjoys a flexibility in life that she hasn't had to abandon intelligence and reason to have. And you are able to look at her and see that her life is not chaos. And so I am comparing, because I am helping you to see something that you have a feeling for, an experience with, so that you might actually dare to risk the chance to let go a lot, and say "Yes!" instead of "Why?" so often. And then explore what's in front of you by virtue of having said "Yes," instead of "Why?"—which really means, "No, not yet! Let me have a few thousand words of explanation, and then we'll see whether I need another few thousand words of explanation before I say, 'Yes'."

 

You will not go berserk if you begin to play again.

 

Do you know that a lot of understanding comes from experience, rather than explanations?

 

Do you want to know something else? I love you. And I stand with you. I stand with you in support of your freedom. I stand in support of the breakdown of your structured bondages of "grown up responsibility" that cause you to be inflexible. And I stand with you in support of your experience of your freedom without penalty. And I'm with you wherever you are. And this support I am speaking of is actively present with you wherever you are. And so, the next time, and the next time, and the next time, and the next time, and the next time that you say, "Why?" instead of "Yes," I want you to remember that I'm there with you saying, "Consider saying 'yes,' and let's explore the experience that is ahead of you, together."

 

I'm glad you asked the question.

 

QUESTION: Thank you, Raj. You know me, all right!

 

RAJ: We are brothers. Of course I do. But, do you know what? You know me, too! That's something you might explore with me. But I won't force you to do it now.

************

 

QUESTION: Raj, I need to know if there's anything I can do to support my friend, Alan, in breaking through this process he's going through. Is there anything I can do to help him?

 

RAJ: You can tell him this for me. He is experiencing self-pity. The self-pity is a defense against the breakthrough. It is a distraction that occupies him and inhibits the breakthrough from occurring.

 

I encourage you to support him in saying, "Thy will be done, not mine." That means that I am encouraging him to say, "Yes," to the movement of God that is his breakthrough, which his ego is defining as a problem to be overcome.

 

QUESTION: I felt like when you were giving this answer to Jeff, that you were exactly describing Alan, too. He seems...well it just felt exactly the same.

 

RAJ: Yes, indeed. And where Jeff says, "Why?" Alan says, "Poor me." And they both mean: "Hold off on my good a little longer!" They keep themselves preoccupied so that they don't have to say yes, yet.

 

Now, mind you, all of you who are sitting in this room and just see "a room" are likewise employing some sort of distraction that says, "Give me a little bit longer before I actually experience a transformation of my vision that allows me to see that the biblical Kingdom of Heaven, the presence and the Movement of God that is Reality, is what is right here in front of me." It's the same problem with everyone. It just has different descriptions!

 

QUESTION: So, would encouraging Alan to play and say, "Yes" be helpful?

 

RAJ: It would, indeed, yes.

***********************************************************************

 

LITTLE "CONTROL" TIME-BOMBS

 

RAJ: Guess who I'm going to call on first, Warren.

 

QUESTION: Who?

 

RAJ: That's not a guess! I would like you to share with us how the practice was this past week.

 

QUESTION: There were a couple of things that I noticed. One was maintaining the awareness of what the practice was, which seemed to be something that needed to be focused on. In other words, it wasn't just a natural process—at least not where I was coming from.

 

RAJ: What made it "not natural"?

 

QUESTION: There's a defense mechanism—automatic defense mechanism—that comes up in me around loving, and there's a lot of confusion around loving, because of my old "traditional" sense of what loving is. As a matter of fact, when you assigned me the practice, the first question that came up to me when you assigned it was: "What actually is loving?" What I take it to mean at this point is being in a feeling place. Just feeling a certain way—that to be the feeling of love. And being in that feeling is what my goal was...to stay that way, even when the button was pushed. In other words, having the button pushed, noticing it's been pushed, and then realizing how you want to transform that, or the place that you don't want to be pulled from.

 

I'm pulled off of that by certain people, by certain situations, by certain activities. It's the recognition of being pulled off that place and then returning back to that place because there's absolutely no good reason not to be there and because whenever I'm not in that place, it always gets worse. So, the experiment was to stay in that place, no matter what happened.

 

But what I found is that I kept coming to a place of neutrality. In other words, I'd feel the button pushed, I'd let the discomfort go. But yet, I couldn't move past neutral.

 

RAJ: Describe "neutral."

 

QUESTION: That's the problem of it. If it were a place of free energy, free breathing, feeling the energy move through me, that would be one thing, but it's almost like being insensitive. In other words, having no sensitivity—not feeling upset, but not feeling really good about a situation, either. That's the hang-up right there.

 

RAJ: It is not really insensitive. It is nonreactive. And many individuals equate reactivity with sensitivity, and thus they think they are very sensitive people. And I am putting that in a "positive" way, because there is a lot of reaction, and a lot of vitality and vigor to their relationships. The neutrality, which you found yourself able to experience, was really your peace. And peace does seem, all by itself, to be an insensitivity to everything, because nothing hooks you.

 

If you will abide in the peace long enough, you will find there is something else present there. And that "something else" is the experience of love, the inner experience of love—not love toward something, but of undefendedness against anything—that allows you to experience being "present with" it all. So this is excellent. But you're not going to move through the neutrality to something else. You're going to abide in the neutrality, or the peace, long enough to find the love that is inseparable from it, but which can't register with you until you are in your peace.

 

Now, I am not going to assign this practice to you again this week, but I am going to wonder why you wouldn't naturally engage in it.

 

I'm going to ask everyone else whether anyone decided to do this practice again in light of what I said last week? And if you did, will you share what your experience was and how it might have compared with the practice as you had engaged in it the week before?

************

 

QUESTION: Raj, the week before, I really seemed to just flow with it all, but maybe it was just that I was in a peaceful space. But this last week, I experienced myself mainly not being in a loving space with myself. And that was very painful. And it was like I brought on a disaster, so to speak, and I just don't know what part of me did that. Except that some part of me—some part that feels lack of self-worth or...I don't know. It happened yesterday. I got out of it after I had a talk with myself. I sort of counseled myself and chose to not stay in the pits. And that was quite a "win." I felt I really overcame this desire to torture myself, which hasn't happened for a long time, but it really didn't feel good at all when I didn't want to let go of making myself wrong and beating myself up.

 

What I did find out is that I remembered you saying that we have a choice to stay in the loving space or to go into judgment. And I finally got very clear that I didn't want to stay in that ugly space. It was too painful.

 

I don't know what happened. I just chose to calm myself down, and the rewards were fabulous.

 

RAJ: You see, for all of you it is going to become easier to recognize when you have gotten off track. I said earlier, when I described this year as the Year of the Miracle, that it meant you would get help. And the help that you would get would be that staying in the ego space would be more uncomfortable than it had been before. As a result, you will not tolerate it as long before you recognize there is another way to look at this, before you remember, "There is another vantage point from which I can view and experience all of this."

 

You, regardless of the reason you got off track, had the experience of quicker recovery, because you more quickly remembered that you didn't have to own this attitude as yours, and therefore, since it wasn't yours, it said nothing about your Integrity for you to abandon it.

 

Curiosity and desire are probably the two most important words any of you can bring into play these days. And if you are in the doldrums, or if you are caught in a fit of ego reaction, no matter what the subject matter, one of the quickest ways to escape from that bondage is to become curious—curious about the one who has come into your experience for the purpose of having his or her divinity recognized, who appears to have offended you, whether it is the opportunity to be curious to recognize the Christ in you, even though who you think you are seems to be justifiably "criticizable."

 

Curiosity opens the door to the prison of your bondage to the uptight, small, self-centered ego frame of reference.

 

Does anyone else have anything they would like to share on this subject?

************

 

QUESTION: Well, I had a pretty quick recovery, like about an hour ago. John came into this house and I gave him a hug, and then he went over and turned on the TV, and he wasn't acting particularly happy to see me. And so, something went off in my head, I guess. I didn't even realize it. It was just so subtle.

 

RAJ: "He was not happy to see me, so I will not be happy to be me!"

 

QUESTION: I should preface this by saying that I was having a very, very happy afternoon, and I was feeling in a very loving place when he walked in. So, something somewhere said, "Well, he doesn't really love you." And I began to sort of question him, you know, about his activities...sort of trying to inflict the guilt. He ended up going upstairs and I ended up going out on the porch. And I was grateful for Mary, because she came out and she said, "Is somebody grumpy?" And I said, "Yes, John is!" But then I realized, after she left, that it was me. I was grumpy. And then, I also remembered what you had said, Raj, in one of the meetings about when someone is reactive, not to get scared by the other person's reaction.

 

As I sat out on the porch, I thought, "This is really silly, because something's telling me that since I thought he didn't love me and I got scared, that I'm going to make him suffer. But I'm the only one who's suffering. And I was really happy—like just a few minutes ago I was really happy—and now I'm suffering." And I thought, "This is really, really silly." And I just let it go, and went upstairs and said, "Hi," to John and it just seemed like I could bounce back easier and just feel in that loving place again.

 

RAJ: Indeed. Thank you for sharing that. One of the most frequent reasons any of you abandons your happiness or your peace is so that you can "get even" for a perceived wrong that has been done to you. That's nothing new to any of you, except that all of you forget that on the occasions when it happens.

 

But! There's something even more pertinent here than understanding that little dynamic. And what is more pertinent here is: "Why do you want to get even?" So that you can make that other person behave the way you want him to behave. Do you know what? All of you are like little "control" time-bombs waiting for an occasion to go off. And so, you see, it's really a sly little game that everyone plays. No, it's a sly little game that the ego plays. And it's a game of "entrapment," so that by virtue of the "innocent way" in which you entrap the other one, you can be in a position to make a demand! And so, it seems as though it was just a little bit of a "hurt feeling" because he didn't really pay much attention to you.

 

Well, that's bull-shit! And I'm not picking on you, because every single one of you does this unconsciously all the time. It's called the human condition. Everyone is waiting for the opportunity to have justification to make "a legitimate demand" on someone else to behave the way he wants them to. Why? Not for love, but for the experience of power, or authority. And it is this that feeds the ego. And the one thing which that doesn't allow for is the natural experience of harmony and joy in a relationship which is likely to be there when no one is having to protect themselves against this game of entrapment that "nobody knows is going on." You say you don't know it's going on, but you all engage in protecting yourself against this activity which all of you deny!

 

Now, I say this not to indict you, or make you feel guilty so that I can lovingly encourage you to change, but so that you might see just how absurd the ego is, and how it works, and, as Erica found out, the process—she didn't use these words—to entrap John. By having an unspoken and even unthought obligation she was laying on him, which he didn't fulfill, she entrapped herself. And all of you entrap yourselves.

 

You are the ones who are miserable. And you are the ones who abandoned your happiness. And you did this whole little jig for the sole purpose of hoping to arrive at a superior position, which could legitimately demand someone else to behave the way you wanted him to behave.

 

You are always the recipient of the ploy your ego is using. You are always the recipient of the ploy your ego is using. So, you see, this practice that I gave two weeks ago, is a very valuable practice, because if it is engaged in, it protects you from your ego's entrapment of you, while at the same time stopping the subtle and sly manipulation which is attempting to control others, thus causing your relationship with others to be kinder, which allows everyone to relax and experience more harmony because defense is no longer needed.

 

If you understand that there is never a justification for abandoning your peace, and therefore the place in which your capacity to love is available to you, then none of you will have to go to counselors or study self-help books in order to acquire more and better psychological skills so that the control can be even more unnoticeable.

 

Enough said.

************

 

QUESTION: Please express to me what I need to be with most right now. And specifics are always welcome if there's any action.

 

RAJ: You, being the embodiment of the Life-Principle, or God, are constantly embraced by That which is embodying you. And that is called Love. And the one thing you can count on—and which everyone else can count on—is that that Love is always present and available to you, no matter where you are in your apparent process of Awakening. It is always present and available to you in language of your present discernment—which is another way of saying, in the language of your present ignorance—as that which meets the need. And so, divine Love—which is the proper description of the Love with which you are embraced by That which is embodying you—being entirely spiritual, needs to not be conceived as something irrelevant to your present experience, and therefore that you might not have tangible evidence of it in practical terms. That is a totally invalid approach.

 

Remember again that the only thing that's confronting you is really the Kingdom of Heaven right here. And It's capacity to register what It really is is ever-present with you, no matter how much you are defending yourself against It by having a definition of it which is incompatible with what it really is. Therefore, there is one thing you can always count on: Your invitation, your desire to experience clarity—the Truth about yourself and the Truth about your world—is going to register with you in tangible and relevant ways. And if it isn't doing that, you haven't made the connection with that Fact yet!

 

So, when you are giving permission, by virtue of your desire to experience your Good, when you giving permission for your Good by having the desire for it, understand that the fulfillment of that desire is not complete until there is the evidence of it. Therefore expect evidence, tangible concrete evidence—a dwelling to be in, transportation to get around in, the means to have insurance to drive the transportation to get around in no matter what the so-called current conditions are—because the condition of the Kingdom of Heaven that all of this really is, and which is misinterpreted as conditions that don't work," always presents you with the Totality, the Wholeness of what It is. That's why it's necessary to desire and expect to have the tangible manifestation of that which meets the need.

 

Now, if you are going to have the tangible evidence of it, then you are bound to be the tangible evidence identifying fulfillment for others. And that means you will be "doing" things. And that means decisions or conclusions will be arrived at. Actions will occur. And they will be actions, which identify fulfillment for others.

 

My whole reason for talking about this is so that you, specifically, and everyone else, specifically, will not continue to conceive of a division between your spiritual growth and your daily experience, between your fulfillment and "life on earth," because it isn't until you see the coincidence of the two—and ultimately the fact that they were never more than One—that you will grasp the fact that there is nowhere to go to wake up. That, as has been said, it is a journey without distance, and that your spirituality is relevant and practical.

 

The more you can trust what I am saying about there being a coincidence of the two, so that you begin to be curious to see the coincidence, the sooner you will have the enlightenment, the realization of the fact that they were never "they" but were always One—never plural, always Singular. And when that happens, "need" and the "fulfillment of need" will always be simultaneous, and it will be called the Movement of Creation and not "the solving of problems."

 

So, for you there needs to be the curiosity or interest to see the coincidence, and be a part of the coincidence by not making the assumption that you need to be overly-cautious about any actions you take because the actions may be manifestations of "accomplishing," and "doing"—all of the things that I have attributed to the ego.

 

You will be something, though. And you will be something that is identifiable, even though it isn't an extension of an ego frame of reference.

 

Now, you, specifically, are embracing, not resisting, the onset of movement, even though you do not know where it is taking you. This is excellent. I will clue you in that this movement, although it may at the moment feel non-specific or not particularly relevant to your current situation, is relevant and there will be specifics—tangibilities. And so, I want you to begin to watch for evidences. Don't try to coerce evidences that would seem desirable to you. Be willing to let them be fuller evidences of fulfillment than you would imagine. But, again, the real curiosity needs to be relative to manifestations, evidences of that which meets the need.

 

QUESTION: I have to just say that I really believe that I've been expecting that, and I hear you and I take to heart your prompting to expect even more than I've been expecting, because I know that that's always possible. And if that's the gist of it, then that's great, and I'd just like confirmation that that is the gist of it.

 

RAJ: That is the gist of it.

************

 

QUESTION: I have a practical question about housing. It's come up again. I've got a 45-day notice that's dropped down to about 30 days now. And although I expect to see the evidence from looking within and listening, I just wonder if you, once again, could help me out on this one. What is your advice as to how to be with it now?

 

RAJ: Let it unfold on God's terms. Have no preexisting preference or concept about how it must occur in order to be acceptable to you. I'm not speaking about the housing being acceptable to you. I am talking about the manner of its appearing—like the fellow, who is on the rooftop in the flood, and the water is rising, and a rowboat comes, and he's been praying to God for resolution to the problem. And since all it [the resolution] looks like is a rowboat and not God, he declines, because his faith is in God.

 

I am not going to go through the whole story, but as many of you know, various forms of help come, even a helicopter. And finally the house is swept away and he drowns and goes to heaven. And he says, "God, why didn't you answer my call?" And He says, "But, I sent the rowboat, and I sent the other things, and I sent the helicopter."

 

So, abandon your best sense of how this must unfold in order for you to validate it as being the Father's Will, or truly acceptable, and be willing to be surprised at God's originality. And, as I shared with Jim, know that the meeting of the need, the fulfillment of purpose, will always be identified tangibly. And then none of you will ever say, "Well, it must not be the thing I need. It must be some form of inner spiritual growth that I must learn." That's just the ego's way of saying, "The tangible evidence of the need being met is still off in the future, and is not your birthright to experience it in your current state of ignorance."

 

I will also tell you that little inner emotional tantrums will not make God do it your way! And the way God will do it will be far superior to your most creative solution. And when you allow God's fulfillment of the need to occur, you will then have the delight of realizing that you weren't responsible for it, and therefore you never have to bear a sense of personal responsibility for your good ever again! That's security. That's invulnerability. And that is everyone's birthright here, now, today.

 

QUESTION: Thank you. I just wonder if you'd care to give me any specific as to the timing on this, when it should be...

 

RAJ: It will be perfect!

 

With a specific and apparently indefinite answer such as, "It will be perfect," you are put in the position of what? Of not being in control. Of having nothing to get hold of.

 

Well, you swim. And you know that if you will lie on your back and let go of control, you will be well supported without any muscular effort being put forth by you. And that is what my answer invites you to do relative to the movement of fulfillment called "thirty days left before your new fulfillment must be in your experience"—not because you say so, but because that's the way it's moving.

 

Trust.

 

If the element of trust increases the visibility of your good, then trust is not only significant, it's very valuable! If, for example, in listening for guidance, the element of trust increases the experience of clarity, and you know that, then you have a reference point for the other statement...that the element of trust increases the visibility of your good. It's not the element of doubt and the exercise of control that increases the visibility of your good.

 

I'm not picking on you, here, because everybody here is faced with the opportunity to abandon the ego's mode of functioning, which is doubt, guilt, and control. And to the very best of your ability, when you are at the point of the movement of transition, be light about it. Be light about your trusting. Be light about your relaxing. You can wear yourself out and drown from trying to hold yourself up under some circumstances. But under those very same circumstances, if you relaxed, you would not wear yourself out and you would not drown.

************

 

QUESTION: There was one question that came up, and it feels like there's a gap in how to get "there" from "here."

 

If I met somebody and they told me that they were divine, how would I treat them? I feel that I'm divine, as we all are. And I feel that there's a difference in how I would treat somebody if they told me they were divine—that I wouldn't treat myself the same way.

 

Any thoughts on this?

 

RAJ: Elaborate a little bit on how you would treat them differently.

 

QUESTION: It feels more like a sense of elevation. Maybe in my mind I place them a little bit higher than myself, and so, consequently, "How do I ever get there?" "How do I ever get high enough to be in the same place?"

 

RAJ: It is interesting that if someone told you they were divine, you would not immediately experience doubt and distrust of them. Because that is just as reasonable. You cannot afford to believe them either way!

 

This is not a question to tackle in the way you are approaching it. The only way you are going to know whether someone else is divine is if you have loved yourself enough to learn how to become still and go into your peace, and pay attention to the experience of Being that you are having, because there you will discover that you are divine experientially. And, as I have said before, that discovery will prove—not intellectually, but at some very fundamental automatic level—that everyone else is divine also. That is the only thing that will alter your behavior toward them honestly and really and correctly.

 

When you do that, you will find that everyone is divine, whether they are able to tell you that or not, whether they are able to tell you that from a place of Knowing or not.

 

You see?

 

QUESTION: Yes. Thank you.

************

 

QUESTION: You have answered my question by talking to other people in some respects. I'm feeling as though it's about time that I leave Kauai. And what I wish to do is world travel and teach. And I don't know if that's going to happen. I'm wondering if you have any thoughts on that.

 

RAJ: Of course. My thought is: When it happens, let me know.

 

Let, let, let. Pay attention to the obvious. Stop seeing ideas as something to implement. Stop using ideas as the basis for actions, and pay attention to what is "in your face," what is actually happening, because what is actually happening is the identification of your movement in your process of Awakening and your process of identifying God here.

 

So, perhaps what you are feeling is an intuition of what is going to happen. And if it is, then I ask you, "When it happens, let me know so I may enjoy with you what is happening." In the meantime, pay attention to what is happening, and let what is happening be the threshold that it really is for your capacity to be the presence of clarity and the presence of love that is transformational right here.

 

The ego, its mode of functioning, is "accomplishment," and it uses thinking as the means of arriving at decisions as to what to accomplish. But the Father is moving in you as You, and the Father is moving in the world—or the Kingdom of Heaven as the Kingdom of Heaven. And that movement is a movement of fulfillment in which every single one of you and every aspect of the infinitude of God's expression is identifying the Movement of Creation.

 

So, whatever is "in your face," whatever is going on, let your attentiveness be there. And if the intuition comes that there will be a change and you will leave the island, let that be an awareness that you have had. And then continue to pay attention to what is unfolding in the moment, because what is unfolding in the moment is your ever-present opportunity to see past the way it appears to you and discover the Kingdom of Heaven, to experience Reality without distortion and suffering.

 

Then when what's "in your face" looks like leaving the island and going somewhere else, that is where the opportunity will be. And when that happens, let me know about it so that I can share with you—not share "knowledge" with you, but share with you in being present with that, which is happening. You see?

 

The ego does funny things. The conditioned thinking does funny things. "Ah, I get the feeling I may be leaving the island. I wonder where I'll be going? I wonder what I'll be doing. There must be a reason that I'll be leaving. There must be something more important than being here, that is coming up. I wonder what it is? Fascinating! I'm so happy! I have something to be curious about. What is coming next?"

 

But, what I'm saying is, you already have something to be curious about, and that is, "What the heck is Really happening now?"—you see?—until "leaving" happens to be "what the heck is happening now" that you want to know the Reality of.

 

So much fulfillment is lost because no one's paying any attention in the place where it's happening. Everything that's happening in the now is valuable. And when leaving is happening in the "now," it will be valuable. But today, it isn't.

 

Don't let your attention be pulled away from the place in which your fulfillment is present to be discovered, even if guidance or intuition provides you with a glimpse of the future.

************

 

QUESTION: I don't seem to have a clue regarding "whether to" or "what to" or "how to" or "when to" or "anything in regard to" going ahead with the land we plan to build on. This last week has just...not overwhelmed me...but it seems to be on everybody's mind and I'm sort of overwhelmed by what's on their mind, I think. So, I'm just seeking a little clarity here, as to whether or not...

 

RAJ: Well, I will tell you something. And I think you probably figured I would.

 

QUESTION: I certainly hoped so.

 

RAJ: You have the opportunity here not to join the crowd by engaging in their concern on their behalf. And in spite of this being the issue on everyone's mind, and in spite of it being that which they are all feeling something about, you can choose for the irrational choice to be in your peace, to be where the insight can be experienced about what is appropriate. And in your choice to do that, you will find yourself being like the leaven in the bread that everyone experiences the benefit of.

 

What I said earlier this evening is of utmost value for you also, because what you are faced with here is the seeming gap between the Father's good pleasure at giving you the Kingdom and your having the Kingdom manifest. And so, what is really inseparable seems to be "two." And that seeming split or separation of what is One into "two," leaves a gap that everyone's ego thinks it has to come up with the solution for—how to get over that gap.

 

Well, no one will ever be able to figure it out because the gap isn't there! Now, if it's hard for everyone else to believe that, that's okay. You don't have to believe that. And you can leave the expectation, the concrete very definite expectation of seeing the manifestation of the fact that it's the Father's good pleasure for you to have the Kingdom. In other words, for that which identifies your fulfillment to not be withheld from you.

 

It is time for someone in your house to begin to be unwilling to join the ego suggestion that the manifestation of fulfillment which God has set into motion can be inhibited from manifesting in your experience as your experience. Somebody needs to see the absurdity of that so clearly that they refuse to cooperate with that suggestion and energize it. It's time to be a little bit demanding. But I want to be very clear here. I am not talking about being demanding of God. I am, rather, talking about demanding that your ability to see the Father's Will cannot truly be taken away from you, and therefore it hasn't been taken away from you, and therefore your capacity to experience the visibility and tangibility of God's fulfillment of Purpose must necessarily become visible.

 

You see, it is a demandingness that is more a matter of an unwillingness to mess around with the preposterous! An unwillingness to believe the preposterous. And an absolute expectation to see the opposite of the preposterous. And what is "the preposterous"? The preposterous is that God is incapacitated and unable to render visible and tangible the Movement of Creation that He is. That's the "preposterous."

 

I don't care how tired you are getting of "expecting." That's just another one of the ego's ploys. I'm going to tell you something, and you know it as well as I do, that there really is nothing that could utterly discourage you completely and totally. Your spunk is still there! And I won't join you in self pity.

 

QUESTION: Thank you. I'm glad you won't do that. I've done that this week a great deal.

***********************************************************************

 

THE COMPU SERVE CONNECTION "CHANNELING"

 

QUESTION: I am new to ACIM. I started to read the text about two years ago and never followed it to the end. About 3 weeks ago a new friend I met at work lent me the video tape, "The Story of A Course in Miracles." I have since read over 100 pages of the text. I am understanding it much more now than before. An old friend of mine and I are now both looking to join a study group. The only question we both seem to have difficulty with is the idea of "channeling." It is something I find very hard to believe in. Can you please give us your feelings on this? I really believe ACIM has given me a new idea and feeling about life and the answers to some of the mysteries of the universe. It has become a new way of understanding the meaning of life, love, and God.

 

Thank you.

 

RAJ: First of all, you have not learned of "channeling" from A Course in Miracles, so please explore the Course on its terms! It would be a shame for you to put it down or have a serious doubt about it because of something not even present between the front and back covers.

 

It is a fact that the word "channeling" is a poor word for any of us to use. It just happens to be the quickest way to convey "the presence of knowledge not arrived at through processes of reasoning or thinking."

 

Let's approach it another way.

 

Let's start with the word "prayer." And let's use the following as an example of prayer:

 

Shepherd, show me how to go,

O'er the hillside steep

How to gather, how to sow,

How to feed thy sheep.

I will listen for thy voice,

Lest my footsteps stray,

I will follow and rejoice,

All the rugged way.

 

—Mary Baker Eddy—

 

In one way or another, this expresses the desire found in all prayer, and those who find prayer meaningful are able to relate to the sentiments found here.

 

However, what do you do if you really get an answer? What do you do if you hear the voice you said you were going to listen for? What do you do if there really is a "Him" and you have heard Him?

 

If you're like most everyone, you will feel "spooked," in more ways than one (smile). The discovery that prayer can be answered directly rather than obliquely is surprising. The discovery that one can have a relationship with the Christ or Jesus (when it becomes real rather than ideal) is disconcerting, to say the least, even though much of Christianity is based upon the necessity of "having a relationship with Jesus." It's as though a relationship is necessary, but don't let it be too specific!

 

Well, if you pray, and you discover that answers come, and the experience is one of communion (a oneness) and love, you realize that you cannot properly call it "channeling." It cannot even be properly called "spiritualism," since it is not a connection with "the dearly departed." The fact is that there is no evidence of "personality" or "ego" in the actual experience of communion.

 

In the case of Helen Schucman, who transcribed A Course in Miracles, she described the experience as an "inner dictation," the source of which she simply called the "Voice." And although it is not apparent from a casual reading, the material you find in A Course in Miracles was pertinent to both Helen's and William Thetford's lives at every point during the seven years the "dictation" was occurring. In other words, it was answered prayer.

 

In the Course, itself, you will find the following: "If you cannot hear the Voice for God, it is because you do not choose to listen. That you do listen to the voice of your ego is demonstrated by your attitudes, your feelings and your behavior."

 

The Course is full of references to "the Voice for Truth" in contrast to the "voice of your ego" and the necessity of making a choice for which voice you will listen to. This is not an invitation to "channel." And those here in the ACIM group are making the choice for the Voice for Truth rather than their egos when they refer to "listening for Guidance."

 

I trust this is helpful, and I know that the responses of others to your question have had to illuminate the subject. If you have more questions, ask, ask, ask!

***********************************************************************

 

For those interested in participating in the activities on CompuServe, just GO RELIGION. We are in the Religion Forum in Section 6, Interfaith Dialog. All messages relevant to the Course and Raj will have the letters "ACIM" in the Subject, making them easily recognizable. If you leave a message, please remember to include the letters ACIM in the Subject so that everyone will know you are there. If you would like further information, call the Foundation office at 808-826-7060 and ask for Judy. She will be glad to answer any questions you might have.

 

***********************************************************************

 

Conversations with Raj, copyright Ó 1994 by Paul Norman Tuttle, is published monthly by the Northwest Foundation for "A Course in Miracles." P.O. Box 870, Hanalei, HI 96714-0870, a non-profit tax-exempt corporation. Phone: 808-826-7060. FAX: 808-826-6555. Subscription price, prepaid, one year in the United States and Canada $30.00 U.S., and Overseas $42.00 U.S. All rights reserved. 

 

You are welcome to copy and share this issue with friends.