CONVERSATIONS WITH RAJ
NOVEMBER - DECEMBER 1988
VOL. 5, NOS. 11 & 12
Body, World, Universe
QUESTION: There is an area of A Course in Miracles that I'm having difficulty with. It is the Course's definition of the physical body, as opposed to what I've come to understand as Raj's definition of the body's purpose.
What I'm perceiving A Course in Miracles as saying is that the body is basically a triumph of the ego, created to attest to our separation, not only from God but from each other. At its most holy purpose it could be used as a vehicle of communication, and other than that it really has no purpose.
What I came to understand from what Raj is saying about the body is that it has a very divine purpose. Somebody asked a question about their gums, and he went so far as to say the gums have a very divine purpose. They're the radiancy of Love. And that seemed to connect with me, and I would really like to understand where I'm misperceiving what the Course is saying about the body.
RAJ: The difficulty lies in the fact that the Course, itself, is written for a readership of egos who do not realize that they are egos, who do not realize that there is any alternative to the means of perception which the Course refers to as ego perception. Therefore, for those who believe that "what they see is what they get," and that that is all there is to everything, there needed to be a clear statement of the illusory nature of everything that was being experienced -- that egos viewing life through the lens of the ego, were experiencing a distortion that could not be taken as fact, that could not be taken as real, because the perception did not allow for an awareness of God in it.
This set of books was addressed to those who have embraced the Darwinian theory of evolution, of physical evolvement out of nothing by pure random chance -- no underlying intelligence behind it or underneath it, but order that just happened to happen.
The phrase, "ashes to ashes and dust to dust," reflects this evolutionary, physical interpretation of everything that is going on as though what comes into existence is very temporary and then goes back into nonexistence -- all of it simply being the effect of matter, of physical evolution.
From within that frame of reference, the experience of everything is false. And this fact needed to be bluntly and clearly stated so that it might dislodge those who read these books from their confidence that they grasp what everything is, and that they are interpreting it and experiencing it correctly.
So, the books speak unequivocally in this respect, and it is the reason that the very first lesson says, "Nothing I see . . . means anything."
At the bottom line that seems very destructive and undermining of one's ability to feel comfortable. "If nothing means anything, then what is the use in my existing?" But, you see, the intent of that lesson is to create such a stir as to "un-rut" people from their accepted beliefs and their firm convictions based upon those beliefs, so that they might be brought to a point where they would say, "If nothing that I see means anything, what does mean something?"
You see, that involves a shift, a stepping back from automatic confidences and inner assurances, and causes one to look beyond, or somewhere else. In that looking, in that inquisitiveness, one puts oneself in the position of inspiration, of enlightenment, of the registering of what the Holy Spirit is conveying, the registering of what is Really going on, which has been blocked by one's confidences that he knows just exactly what this physical world is, and is fairly confident that he knows where it came from and how it came about.
In the act of inquisitiveness, of openness, it becomes possible for what the Father is to register with one. This is why the Course was written in such unequivocal terms. The terms do not allow one to hang onto even their highest concept of what the earth and what the world and what the body is. It doesn't allow one to harbor pet theories -- even more enlightened concepts of what it all is than everyone else has -- because even those stand in the way of one's being receptive to the truly undistorted perception of what everything is.
You could say that the Course is the great "un-rutter." But, something must come after what has been un-rutted. Now one has freedom of movement. One is not caught in a channel from which there can be no variation. Out of the rut there is total freedom of movement, so there must come an experience and an understanding of the territory in which this freedom is occurring.
Now comes the opportunity to more correctly discern the world that has not disappeared, and understand it in the context of the infinite expression of the Father. In my working with those who find their way to have a conversation, this perspective is being provided as well.
You see, as I have also indicated, you cannot have a false sense of nothing. You cannot have a distorted perception of nothing. You cannot have a counterfeit of nothing. It must be a distorted sense of something. It must be a counterfeit of something. You cannot have a counterfeit $4 bill, because there is no real $4 bill to be counterfeited.
That which the ego has been looking at has been the presence of the Father. But the ego, in order to maintain its apparent and supposed existence, must deny the existence of the Father, and so the ego redefines everything in its own distorted way.
Tell me, if you wish to take the first narrative of Creation given in the Bible, in which everything that was made was made, and the Father beheld it, "and behold, it was very good" -- in other words, the Father saw Himself in it -- why is it that there needed to be a second description of Creation, which truly refers to the ego's process of re-identifying what the Father has made, in which everything becomes named?
Everything already was. It was what it was, and what it was was known and experienced fully. There was no need to name it, except that the ego, in order to succeed in denying the Father, had to redefine that which the Father had already defined as His own Self-expression. The ego needed to redefine it in its own terms, thus apparently making that thing independent and different from what was truly the only creative Movement, which is described in the first chapter of Genesis.
Now, the process of Awakening is a process of releasing the ego's definitions, which are false, and, along with those false definitions, the distorted experience of That which has always been as the expression of the Father. One becomes freed from concepts or definitions and receptive to the clear, undistorted experience of what the original Creation was and is that required the ego to redefine It in order to apparently make a creation unlike the Father's.
Mind you, the ego is incapable of creating anything. Therefore its "creation" was constituted of a distorting of the perception of the only Creation there was, and, by virtue of that false definition, causing the only Creation there was to appear to be unlike its Source, and therefore independent of the Father.
So, you see, literally everything the ego sees, which is constituted of its biasing of Creation Itself, is false, and cannot achieve great heights. It cannot exalt itself and become worthy of entering the Kingdom of Heaven. The biased perception of Reality will fade. It will dissolve. It will no longer be. But there will not be a void in its place.
What will be left will be the original and ongoing Movement of Creation that the Father is and always has been being. But, I will tell you that your experience of It will be radically different from your experience of It now.
The key factor that needs to be understood is that once one is unrutted, one cannot continue walking around in a state of denial, stating that "there can be no God in my experience because it is all illusion." If one continues to deny the body or the forms in the world, one is denying the very place where the Father is being the Movement of Creation with absolute perfection. And if one is turning away from it on the basis that it is "absolute illusion" (which is like talking about dry water), one then does not have his attention in the very place where the Father is present to be recognized. That is nonproductive, and it inhibits the further experience of freedom that is now necessary since one has become un-rutted.
I am not contradicting what the Course says. What the Course says still stands. You must understand that it is referring to everything that is seen from within the ego's frame of reference. As one moves out of the ego's frame of reference and accesses his or her own greater capacity to be aware divinely, the distortions and the limits of the ego's frame of reference begin to fall away, and greater evidences of harmony begin to unfold. The undistorted perception of Reality "comes to view," and it is experienced as transformation or healing.
The fact is that one must recognize that unless he or she is totally awakened, whenever he or she looks at anything, he or she is not seeing its absolute divine Meaning. One is still seeing, to one degree or another, the distortion inherent in the ego's frame of reference.
Therefore, at one and the same time, there must be a willingness to not assume that you know what anything is or what anything means, and yet there must be the willingness to acknowledge that each thing has Meaning. That Meaning is derived from the Father and has very little to do with the way in which it is currently being perceived.
In this way, with this apparently split dynamic, it becomes possible for you to be willing to let go of whatever confidences you have in your "understanding" of a thing, without feeling that you are letting yourself into a void, into an emptiness, into a nothingness, because there is at the same time an assurance which I have shared, and which, if you will pay attention, your Soul will tell you is correct, that you are being able to let go because you are opening up to and letting yourself into the clearer experience of the presence of God, and God's infinite Self-expression called Creation.
So, you see, the two together allow a withdrawal of investment from the ego's frame of reference, which is totally false, a totally false perception of the one and only Reality, and a greater investment of trust in the presence of the Father right where He has seemed not to be. The two promote your ability to move out of the illegitimate limits that the ego sense has imposed on the Christ that you Are, and help move you into the capacity to own your divinity, own your Christ-hood, and own as real and present and Actual the omnipresence and the omnipotence of the Father. Where? Not in the future. Not around the corner. But right where you are at this moment!
The minute you begin to look for the presence of That which is divine in anything, the ego gets scared, because it means you are not buying into its suggestion that what a thing is is what it appears to be, and that's it.
In your insistence upon finding the Father right where you are, you are, by your attitude, putting the ego in second place. In effect, you are sending it behind you, out of your range of vision, out of the range of what you are willing to give your attention to. And therefore, in withdrawing your allegiance to it and its point of view, you are aligning yourself with your enlightenment. You are aligning yourself with the opportunity to find God in your fellow man -- which means beginning to recognize his or her divinity, his or her Christ-hood, his or her innocence.
By virtue of your own exalted view -- because you have been willing to let it in, because you are not denying it and pushing it away, calling it an illusion -- you join with your brother at the level of his Being, and in so doing strengthen It. Not that It has been weak, but you strengthen It in that your comfort with It allows him to conceive that maybe he can be comfortable with It and not need to deny It. Thus, as an experience within him, it becomes possible for It to become strengthened.
Your expression of Love, your recognition of that which is Real in your brother, becomes transformational. Your brother does not disappear, because, you see, he is not just an ego. He is the Christ, upon whom the ego has superimposed its false personal sense or definition. It has imposed this incarceration in a limited frame of reference upon him inappropriately, without authority, and therefore without anything to actually enforce the incarceration.
Therefore, when you, relative to yourself, or you, relative to another, do not discount yourself, do not discount that other as being totally false, "because obviously you are both egos," you become un- rutted. You acknowledge that you are not the ego that you seem to be, even though you don't know what you really Are. Then there is an investment of trust in a divinity that something in you tells you is there, or which the Course tells you is there. And in shifting your attention in this way, your clarity, your greater capacity to be aware divinely, begins to emerge and register with you, because you are no longer denying it by giving your allegiance to the ego.
If there is nothing Real, called body, which the ego is creating a distorted perception of, then how can you be sure that there is something Real called the divine Individuality that you Are, behind the ego that is "obviously" what you are? You see, it is not reasonable for you to assume that if the ego parading itself as you is wiped out, that all experience of existence for you will be wiped out. And yet that is just as reasonable as to say that the perception and experience of body through the lens of the ego is false and that when it is wiped out there will be no body left, that there will be nothing identifying -- rendering visible and tangible to Mind -- the presence of the Individuality or consciousness that you are.
So, there is not an inconsistency. It is just that the Course is specifically expressed in a way that most effectively un-ruts those upon whom the ego has imposed the greatest limitation, so that they might become open enough and inquisitive enough to allow the revelation of Creation in Its Actuality. It was the first step.
If I may put it this way, what you have heard me say, and what you have read in the Newsletters, deals with what one does with what is still going on after one becomes un-rutted. It's the second step. And, ultimately, the second step can serve to justify the first step for those who are consciously engaged in their awakening process.
QUESTION: What is your answer to a question I have been asked as a facilitator for the local Course in Miracles study group? How was the body created? The Course says God did not create the body. In another place in the Course, I believe it says something to the effect that our minds did not create the body. What part did something like evolution play in all of this?
RAJ: To put it simply and briefly, God, the Father is the Creator, the Mover, if you will -- the Movement of Which is called Creation.
Now, the Bible accurately expresses the idea that the Father Moved, and saw the Movement, and expressed that "it was very good." What this means is that the Father recognized Himself in His Movement.
Let me put it this way. The Bible says, "And God saw everything that He had made, and behold, it was very good." I have said this before, and changed the wording to express the idea more clearly, that "God saw everything that He had made, and behold, it was, verily, God."
The Movement of the Father is the expression of Meaning, and the Meaning is clearly apparent to the Father -- experienceable. And His infinite Self-expression, which is forever continuing, is experienceable specifically! Therefore every form that you see is that expression of Meaning. However, you are not seeing it with the clarity of the Father's vision because your vision is clouded by, distorted by, the ego's bias, which it brings to everything that the Father is.
Now, the body, as you are experiencing it, is not the body as the Father expressed it. Therefore, your experience of it is distorted, and when that distorted experience is treated as though it is truth, you are deluded, and that "truth" is an illusion. It is in this sense that the statement that the body is the "triumph" of the ego is accurate.
But, you must understand that the Meaning that was expressed by the Father, which has been distorted perceptually by the ego -- not distorted in Actuality, but distorted perceptually -- is Real. Therefore, the process of yielding to the Will of the Father is going to involve the revelation of the undistorted original Meaning of the infinite manifestation of the Father, because the distorting or biasing dynamic which the ego has introduced will fade right along with the ego.
You see, the problem is that from within the ego's frame of reference, the absolutely spiritual or mental Nature and Substance of the Father's Self-expression is interpreted as "physical," and self-existent, operating according to material laws, laws of matter, physical laws. And this contributes to the ongoing ignorance of the undistorted original Meaning of the infinite manifestation of the Father.
The Father has not created a material world and universe, or a material body. The Father has Moved, and the Movement is as divine and spiritual and mental as the infinite Mind that Moved. You must understand that the objects of consciousness, the ideas which the infinite Mind or infinite intelligence has "created" by virtue of Its Movement, are perfectly tangible, recognizable and perceivable to that Mind. The ideas have substance that is as palpable to Mind as the so-called material objects are to the ego that perceives them.
The infinite creation of the Father is not intangible, even though it is not physical. The infinite manifestation of the Father is not ethereal, and therefore vague and insubstantial. The Father has expressed Himself. The Father is the Movement of Self-expression at this instant, and That is what constitutes existence and the experience of Life. So, there is a Real and tangible Meaning, there is a Real and tangible Self-expression of the Father, that constitutes what the ego is biasing and distorting, and which is called a "physical, material body." But, the Father is not expressing Himself as a material body.
Ignorance, which is another word for the ego, is covering over the experience of the Kingdom of Heaven, the experience of Reality, with a very limited and partial experience of that Reality and calling that experience a total experience. There is, therefore, a distorted concept of body that the human mind -- in other words, conscious human Individuality, which is at the moment unaware of its Totality -- did not create.
There seems to be an experience of body as material, as physical, as capable of being ill, of sinning, of dying, which we could say the ego has "created," except that the ego is not a creator, and so there is not a separate "creation" of the ego. There is simply a very partial experience of Reality that is being taken as a total experience of Reality, and therefore the false or distorted experience of body represents nothing more than a deluded perception -- what could better be described as a hallucination. But, what is being experienced does not constitute an actual creation.
Again: As one begins to yield to the Will of the Father, and in so doing discovers that the Will of the Father constitutes the only Will of conscious human individuality, and one begins to come into a fuller experience of his divinity and of his divine Integrity, the distortions relative to the Meaning identified as body will begin to fade. And the body will begin to reflect back more harmony and more health and more perfection, until eventually the "physical accompaniments" -- the capacity to be sick and to die, the ability to be deformed, to be dysfunctional, to be organic and dependent upon food and air and water for existence -- will fade until the equally tangible and substantial experience of the Meaning that is the Self-expression of the Father comes fully to light.
I am playing on words, here, because literally the forms of Self-expression that are the result of the Movement of the Father are what can be best conveyed to you as "Light forms." And the substance of that Light is Love. And the experience of Body will be significantly enhanced because the experience of Body will constitute the experience of an aspect of the Father in expression, in which all that the Father is is available to be experienced.
Now, we could talk for hours in order to illuminate this further, but this gives you a starting point.
QUESTION: Sex has always been a big problem in my life. It's been a tremendous drive, and has created a lot of lessons.
For some time I have been impotent, and I'm wondering, what is the message I'm supposed to be getting from this? Is it an attack on myself, an attack on my wife? I'd like to have your comments on it.
RAJ: It is an attack on you by your ego for the purpose of creating confusion, especially around your feelings of guilt relative to your sexual self-expression.
You are not your ego, and so this is not an attack on you by you. It is an imposition upon you that is causing you not to experience your full capacity of expressing the full functions of your body as well as the expression of love in your relationship.
Now, how do you challenge the ego's imposition? Well, I will tell you that if you are going to treat your body as an illusion, as the ego's triumph against the Father, then you will have absolutely no basis for regaining the capacity of this particular function of your body. Indeed, if the body is the ego's triumph, then you are well rid of this capacity, aren't you? And you are actually free of a "problem" -- the problem of sexuality.
But, you see, this is not the case, and there is something in you that tells you that the normal capacity of your body to function sexually is desirable and is expressive of Truth at some level. You challenge the ego's imposition, here, by bringing this particular member of your body into subjection to Christ. And what is the Christ if it is not the undistorted conscious experience of the infinite Self-expression of the Father in and as every aspect of His infinite Creation.
The necessity here is to be able to embrace your body in the context of the omnipresence of the Father. And then, on the basis that every function of the body partakes of the Nature of the Father, and on the basis that you desire to experience the Nature of the Father right there where your body is, begin to allow yourself to feel sexually. You really have no other words for it than that. But, when you think of the word "sexually" do not interpret it as a physical function of matter that is a "base" function that it would be preferable for you to rise above. Rather, associate it with the natural experience of joy that comes from becoming undefended against another, becoming defenseless with another, becoming sensitive to That in another which is divinely Real, and communing with It.
Again, it is inappropriate for you to be experiencing this imposition, and I encourage you not to assume that it is some learning lesson provided by the Father. It is nothing more and nothing less than a downright imposition of the ego covering up your capacity to fully express love.
Do not say, "Well, there are many other ways for me to express love." There is not any reason to exclude one, or even a dozen of a million ways to express love.
Embrace your capacity for sexual expression in the context of the Allness and the Nature of God. Bless it in this way, and see whether the impotence continues. It is not the presence of the Father, which causes impotence. It is the imposition of the ego, attempting to express its triumph over the infinite expression of the capacity to love that the Father is being.
Dysfunctions of the body, the death of the body, all manifest the presence of the ego. The presence of the Father finds manifestation in exactly the reverse. As I have said before, if the body was illusion, then when I healed the man with the withered arm, his arm would have disappeared. It would not have resumed its normal and full expression and capacity to be as the other arm, and to constitute the wholeness of that man right where he was.
I will tell you that when we were on what has come to be called the Mount of Transfiguration and the disciples who were with me saw us in what were called raiments of glistering white, they were experiencing the Body of Light and not robes at all. They were seeing the Meaning expressed by the Father of His Self-expression. And His Self-expression is identifiable as what can best be called form, and the substance of the form is the substance of the Father, because the Father has nothing else with which to work to express Himself, and that substance is Love and Light.
They experienced the Body without the apparent material accompaniments that seem to come into perceptual existence by virtue of the ego's distortion of the Body, the ego's distortion of the perception of the Self-expression of the Father that is the Body of Light -- the form constituted of the substance of Love that is Light.
Body is Real. The perception of it at the moment is deluded. And the delusion, when it is considered to be a true perception, is an illusion. Now, that states it clearly. So, I encourage you to embrace your body in that context with the desire to experience it truly -- not in a deluded way, and not with any dysfunctions whatsoever -- and see whether or not healing is what occurs!
It is the result of the delusion that one experiences as dysfunctions, decay, and even apparent death of the body. But I will tell you, no one who has passed on has found himself to be bodiless -- without that which identifies his or her presence. And one does not totally wake up and lose, or find himself without anything, which identifies his presence.
Praise your body because something in you grasps that the Substance of it and the reality of it is the Father, and that the body is incapable of expressing any other Intent than that which the Father has set into motion by virtue of His Movement. And watch the body begin to respond in all ways healthfully.
QUESTION: I need to really go into depth about what is going on in my body and the sexual issues that have caused the vaginal infection. I just want to put it to rest. I want it to be over, and I want to know what needs to be resolved, what the origins of it have been, and where I need to go from here. Just generally, what is the problem in the body, and what do I need to do that I'm not currently doing or aware of?
RAJ: Over all it is that you are not claiming with authority the divinity or divine nature of your body. You are, and have been willing to consider it to be a physical organism that is a temporary host to your Individuality, or your Soul. Yet, the body is inseparable from your Individuality. It is absolutely divine in function, even though it is misperceived as physical and as having a physical origin.
The necessity is to begin to acknowledge every cell, every atom, every nucleus and electron of your body as being absolutely divine, as being the energy of Spirit rendered visible and tangible to consciousness, or Mind, and to begin to claim or acknowledge the impossibility of it reflecting anything other than its Source, which is the divine Mind, or God.
You see, your Individuality is the direct expression of the divine Mind. Your Individuality is the Father Self-expressed. That which the Father expresses is experienceable. If the Father is infinite intelligence, infinite Mind, and Its Movement is experienceable, then the Movement must be of the same Nature as the Mind which is Moving. Therefore the Movement, or I will use the word "manifestation," must likewise be mental.
The fact that your body and your world are interpreted as physical, separate and self-existent, different from the Mind that perceives them, is reflective only of the current limited perception of those examining them. I have indicated before, but not directly to you, that we are very shortly going to see your scientists recognizing the absolute inseparability of the observer from the observed; that indeed there is an absolute correlation between Mind and the movement of the Universe that is considered to be physical. And when this direct connection is demonstrated, then life and the Universe will, for the first time, truly begin to be approached as spiritual and the division of existence into spiritual and material will cease.
Now, you do not need to wait until your scientists demonstrate this fact in order to find it proven in your immediate experience. If your body is the visibility and tangibility of Meaning, which the Father has expressed because it is His Nature to express Himself, then there is no source from which any actual imperfection can emerge. This is what needs to be claimed by you, acknowledged by you. Yet the human mind wants an explanation as to where this "other evidence" came from. And I will simply say that to the degree that manifestation is misinterpreted to be physical and self-existent, apart from that which observes it, which constitutes a mistake, and that mistake is taken to be truth, and conclusions are arrived at on the basis of that mistake, then the conclusions are going to be false, but treated as truth.
The idea that your body is something which your Soul came "into" sometime at or shortly after conception, and that your Soul leaves the body when the body apparently dies, causes one to not feel the greatest degree of security, because the body is looked at as a host, a temporary dwelling for the Soul -- a dwelling that is not necessarily consistent with the purposes of the Soul -- and it is like living in a building in a bad part of New York which is likely to be condemned at any moment. One cannot let down and relax and be comfortable and confident. So, fear becomes a "natural" part of one's existence relative to his body.
The fear, the doubt, and actually the dislike, the hate of the body that develops because it well could act at odds with one's greatest desires, introduces a distorting dynamic to one's perception. The distortions are called disease -- lack of ease -- in one form or another.
If one remains locked into the sense of the body being a physical organism, a host, one then must simply put up with whatever is "dished out," whatever may or may not happen with the body. But the fact is that you, as the direct expression of the Father, will always have that which identifies the presence of who you Are, the presence of your Individuality.
When the context changes from a physical universe in which a divine Soul finds Itself to a spiritual universe that is the infinite manifestation of the Father, and is entirely mental, and therefore is incapable of embracing anything unlike the Father, then you begin to have justification for challenging whatever physical limits or diseases present themselves. And you are no longer locked into just putting up with circumstances, or just putting up with a physical condition.
In shifting from the material context of life to the spiritual or Actual context of it as divine, one begins to be able to release the fear, the doubt, the lack of confidence in what one's body is going to do. In fact, one is able to release the idea that the body is capable of acting separate and independent from Oneself, at odds with Oneself. And in that relaxation the distortions that had been occurring as a result of the fear will disappear with the dissolving of the fear, and you will experience what is called healing. Not because a physical body has been improved, but because a limited perception of a divine presence has been released and the associated distortion has dissolved, thereby uncovering the primitive perfection, the original perfection, that the Father has constantly been being.
What is needed here is for you to begin to dare to claim your physical perfection on the basis of God being the source and condition of your body, and of every form there is. But, of course, we are dealing specifically with your body, here.
The Nature of God must constitute the condition of the form called "your body." Therefore, that which is unlike the Father cannot be a true manifestation of your body, and you are not required to energize it with your belief in it. You have the authority, rather, to challenge it, to disagree with it, and not buy into it.
As you begin to conscientiously do this, you will find the various symptoms that have come and gone, not coming and going any more, because you will be less defended against your body. You see, the fear, the doubt and mistrust of your body, are expressions of fear and constitute or actually elicit defense against it, as though you needed to protect yourself against what your body might do. And that defense is what distorts your experience of your physical perfection.
You have simply needed an intelligent rationale for approaching your body differently, in a way that would uncover its natural perfection, which everyone else will be inclined to call "healing," as though a physical body has been improved. But, for you the process will have illuminated a truth beyond the belief that the body is just a physical organism and that it is just a temporary habitat for your Soul. You have always had, and you will always have, that which identifies the presence of your Individuality. They are inseparable -- your Individuality and your body.
Obviously, you will not go through eternity experiencing physical complaints. And if you are not going to go through eternity experiencing physical complaints, it means that you will have arrived, sooner or later, at the clear perception of and, I am going to say, immaculate conception of your body -- which is what we have been talking about here. The conception of it as a physical organism, a temporary host, is not an immaculate conception of it. It is not one that is free of illusion.
So, this is what is needed, and it will give you the basis for claiming your freedom from any complaint or ache or pain or illness or disease. And it will set you on the path of your discovery of the divine Nature of all forms, and therefore of the Integrity of everything you are currently perceiving, although in a limited way.
QUESTION: Help me understand. When I have tiredness or soreness in my body, it's a bio-feedback to tell me I need to rest, or I'm overextended, or something's wrong. I don't understand the difference between fear and honoring oneself by paying attention to the feedback.
RAJ: Indeed, illness, together with the tiredness or soreness that you mentioned, is feedback indicating that you are existing in a state of mental confusion, where what you are believing to be true is inconsistent with the Reality. And when you are thinking inconsistent with Reality, you are thinking inconsistent with your Self. There is an incongruence there, and the incongruence is what is reflected back to you, as you put it, as a "bio-feedback" -- a reflecting back to you that you are out of sync with your Self, you are out of sync with the truth of You.
Now, there is absolutely no connection between fear and honoring Oneself, because honoring Oneself involves the acknowledgment of the divinity of one's Individuality and the divinity or spirituality of one's form, since it is the visibility and tangibility of your Individuality. It is the acknowledgment of the presence of the Father Self-expressed and called "Jane Doe/her body," because "Jane Doe and her body" are that which express the Meaning that the Father is expressing.
Fear, on the other hand, is the introduction of a concept of separation, of being the body rather than the mind in which the experience of body is going on as a conscious experience. It is the result of thinking that the Soul is tiny and can occupy a body for a period of time and then disengage from it. In that sense of tininess there is an accompanying sense of vulnerability, and in the face of vulnerability, one develops defenses.
This is all expressive of functioning at odds with what is true about Oneself. One cannot do that and be comfortable. So, the discomfort of it shows up somewhere in the spectrum of one's being, either as emotional disturbance or what is called physical disturbance. When the doubt and the sense of separation and vulnerability creep in, creating fear and defense, the bio-feedback, as you put it, comes into play to say, "you are acting at odds with your Self." "You are acting at odds with Being." It is not calling for guilt. It is not calling for judgment. It is calling for you to give your attention once again to honoring your Self by acknowledging Yourself truly, and allowing your feelings about Yourself and your body and your world to emerge from that acknowledgment of Truth.
QUESTION: Since my difficulty in my body has been in the sexual arena, and just in terms of general limited energy, I'd like to know specifically around the sexual issue, have I resolved those?
RAJ: You are in the process of releasing them, although the release is not total yet. You see, if your body is interpreted as a physical organism, it is almost as though something which is divine is inhabiting a "physical creature" -- something different from Itself. And then when one's capacity for sensitivity and intimacy finds expression through sexuality, this divine capacity becomes misinterpreted as a primitive drive of the host organism, which, because it is so meaningful, or so stimulating, must be overridden, so that one does not become consumed by the "passions" of the host organism -- so that one does not lose his Soul to some aspect of this host, this dwelling.
One begins to build up an attitude of denial toward this "unspiritual" characteristic of the host organism called the body, and in doing that, begins to engage in Self-denial, because there is no host organism! There is no temporary dwelling. And the experiences, which are defined as "sexuality," are divine capacities for experiencing the Oneness of everything.
You are engaged in releasing this Victorian attitude around sexuality. You are making headway. And you can expect the afflictions, the physical symptoms in this area, to diminish, fade away, because you are coming into a greater experience of your Integrity in this area, and the fact that this area of experience is not different from or less than or "beneath" what you divinely Are. You are embracing your sexuality more consciously, and with less illusion about it.
What we are talking about today will allow you to "put the seal on" your further experience of dissonance in the area of your sexuality, both physically and emotionally.
QUESTION: [A long list of physical complaints diagnosed by two health care professionals was provided, together with a discouraging prognosis.] My first question is whether you agree with the diagnoses, in whole or in part; and if in part, which parts you disagree with?
RAJ: This, of course, does present a very bleak picture, especially if each aspect of the body is considered to be interdependent, rather than dependent directly upon its Source, which is the Life-Principle, or God, the Father.
I cannot deny the findings, but I must deny the conclusions, simply because there is not the capacity, within the frames of reference being used by these two health care professionals, to ally the body directly with the Father, and therefore be able to step outside of the apparent interdependency of the various aspects of the body. Indeed, the healing of these symptoms can only be arrived at through this ability to identify every part of the body with the Father as its Source.
Now, your body, although it is currently perceived to be like a string of Christmas lights -- which, if one light goes out, the whole string goes out -- is actually more like the string of Christmas lights where if one light goes out, that is the only light that goes out, and has absolutely no effect on any other light on the string.
You must understand and give some conscious thought to the fact that every single atom, every single molecule, every single electron, and so on, every single cell, every tissue, every organ, is the expression of Meaning, having arisen out of the Mind of God, which is continuing to arise out of the Mind of the Father, unflawed in any way.
It must not be seen that the circulatory system can be disadvantageous to cells, to the extremities of the body, or to any part of the body, as though it could cause anything, because you must come back to the Fact that there is only one First Cause. And you must begin to recognize that your body and the Meanings expressed by all of its various forms are the current expression of a current and living God. This, if embraced and felt and allowed to be true, will allow you to relax and release any sense of personal responsibility, and any sense that you could actually be at the mercy of your body as though it expressed an intent separate and apart from the Father's intent, which is to be.
Now, YOU could attempt, on the basis of their prognosis and determinations, to deal with the situation from that level. But, what is going to heal is to step beyond that level, which is what I have just described doing. The connection between the Father and the body must be seen to be absolute.
Every cell in your body has a relationship to the Father, just as you do. Your relationships with your fellow man become smooth -- ironed out, if you will -- as you open up to your relationship with the Father and are not defended against it in any way, because it is only in the Father that you can find your unity and therefore your harmony with your fellow man.
Relationships are not to be worked out between human beings, but in the discovery that the only relationship there is is between the Individuality and his Source -- meaning the Father -- and in allowing for the experience of that relationship, finding that the dissonance in personal relationships has dissolved because one is not approaching relationships through space, from body to body.
Likewise, the harmony of the body, the health of the body, is not the result of cooperation between parts of the body, but is the inevitable manifestation of the fact that every cell, tissue, atom, has its relationship with the Father. Because it expresses the unity of the Father, when viewed in a larger aspect -- embracing the whole body -- it appears that there is harmony and therefore cooperation. But the fact is that the harmony is there because there is no relationship between the parts of the body. The parts of the body, individually, have their relationship with their Source and can do nothing other than be the Meaning of the expression of that Source, which, because the Father is One and indivisible, constitutes a recognizable integrity of the Whole in form.
QUESTION: Can you tell me about what I would characterize as the error or misperception underneath these individual symptoms? For example, what you're saying is that the right hand is not connected to the "closed heart," but that the right hand has an independent relationship to God. What is it that I am projecting, then, that is causing the organization within that hand to be inharmonious?
RAJ: It is not so much a matter of what you are projecting as it is what you are withholding. And what you are withholding is the acknowledgment of God right there where that hand is. It is a withholding of appreciation, of love.
Now, the result of withholding that causes you to be in a state of fear, which you then attach to the hand or the part of the body that seems not to be functioning correctly, and that develops into distrust of that part of the body, and creates great agony emotionally and intellectually. But the reason for it is that there has been a withholding of the acknowledgment of the presence of God, and God's Purpose, right there in the hand, or the part of the body reporting distress.
The necessity is to embrace the body with love, to acknowledge its divinity, and in that acknowledgment be the absence of fear, doubt, distrust, and even hate of the body. Thus, the body's divine intent to identify the presence of your Individuality perfectly, has the opportunity to register with you, and with anyone else looking at you, as a healed body.
It is not that you project hate and fear and doubt and distrust upon your body and create the illusion of disease. Projection has nothing to do with it. Those experiences, or emotional reactions are simply what is left when you have withdrawn identification of your body, or your world, or yourself, from the Father, and hold it, or yourself, to be separate and apart and different from the Father.
Now you are beginning to grasp the great necessity of not identifying the body as illusion. The dissonance of the body is illusion. That it can seem to be capable of dying is an illusion. And since those two factors seem to dominate human thought about the body, all other perceptions of the body, are or tend to be, invalid, and therefore illusory. But, you must bring, as the Bible says, every member of the body into subjection to Christ. And that does not constitute the annihilation of the body, but its exaltation, perceptually speaking into the experience of its perfection.
QUESTION: I have made a list of what I term possible mental causes of this physical disharmony ...
RAJ: I will tell you something. The only cause is the fundamental withdrawal of love. As to specific beliefs, you will find that as you begin to honor your body by loving it as the divine manifestation of the current Will of God -- not in its deformed or dysfunctional state, but in its fundamental purpose and intent -- you will find your specific doubts, or your specific objections, which are what I will call mind-sets, surfacing. And it will then be easy for you to take a look at them so that you may discard them consciously.
It is like turning on the light. The brighter the light gets, the easier it is to see what is cluttering up the room. And so, the exercise or practice of loving your body will act as the light and disclose to you easily the objections, the clutter, that needs to be trashed. You can depend on the very nature of the presence of Light. It is not that it is disclosing to you your flaws. It is that it is providing you the illumination necessary to exercise your intelligence and bring order to that which it was difficult to bring order in the dark.
QUESTION: As I understand what you just said, it was to love the intent behind the expression of my physical body. Not to hold compassion for it and love its deformed or poor little weak hand aspect, but to work at expressing love for the intent behind my expression, and in that light these misperceptions will be presented to me. Did I hear that correctly?
RAJ: You have it exactly, yes. You do not love the illusion. You do not love the distortion. You love that which is present, which is the expression of the Father, but which at the moment is being covered up by the effect of lack of love, the effect of hate, the effect of distrust, the effect of interpreting the body as a purely physical organism, which is serving as a temporary host for your Soul. You do not love those interpretations or the effects of those interpretations. You love the Actual presence about which those interpretations are distortions. And that then allows for the uncovering of habitual inconsistencies, which you have been embracing that are incongruent with the divine Actuality of your body.
In the disclosure of those inconsistencies you are able to separate the chaff from the wheat, and throw out the chaff, release it, and in the releasing of it observe your body becoming more clearly present in its perfection. This is called healing. It is really the revealing of what has always divinely been present, and it does not constitute the regeneration or "fixing up" of a physical organism that you are still experiencing as a temporary host for your Soul.
QUESTION: Okay. So, I want to love the intent of the expression, and I think you're going to tell me that any intellectual effort to find "Meaning" in what is being expressed in this physical world is fruitless. Am I correct in kind of perceiving here that I need to love something I don't really understand or see? I need to love what is really a kind of mystery, since I don't know the "divine purpose" of this world?
RAJ: That is correct. It is only a mystery because you are not used to expecting to find God right there where your hand is, or where a tree is, or where the moon is. So, in the newness of this idea, it is as though you are being asked to let yourself into the Unknown -- a Mystery. But, as you begin to do this, and in little ways you begin to find healing occurring, the meaning will become less of a mystery.
Now, when I say "little ways," even the complete healing of all of the physical symptoms you have described would still count as "little ways," because there is still the whole universe and everything in it for you to discover the presence of God in.
Intellectually speaking, it is not without value to look at a thing and ask in your mind, "What is the Truth here in this leaf, in this tree, in this blade of grass, in this clod of dirt," et cetera. It is not impractical for you to mentally express the desire to discern God's purpose in the particular expression of form that you might be looking at.
The disclosure, the revelation of the divine intent, will not come as an intellectual process or flow of words, but rather as an experience of Meaning. So, once you have gone through the intellectual process of expressing your desire or your inquiry in words, then you must leave words behind and not search for words in your mind, but allow, trustingly, the Meaning to unfold Itself at an internal or experiential level, whether that explanation or experience of Meaning comes instantly, or later in the day, or the next day.
The point is to create an "open-endedness" by virtue of your inquiry, and then leave the inquiry open-ended by not filling it with your best conjectures, so that the desire to Know may be filled with the Knowing because you are defenseless -- defenseless in the sense of not blocking the answer by trying to provide one, yourself, through your best intellectual processes.
QUESTIOIN: You have partly addressed this question before I have spoken it. I'm going to speak it anyway. In my most recent experiences it feels like the thought form most powerfully blocking my creative self-expression in a positive relationship to life as a physical expression stems from the feeling that it's not okay to be here because this world is an "attack on God." The very body whose health I want to support is an attack on God. And yet in the principles of A Course in Miracles, if my body is used lovingly, perfect health will result and death will be overcome. The profound split between body, earth, physical experience, and God evoked by the Course, is painful and alienating to me. It alienates me from relating to my physical experience as divine, and so ...
RAJ: I am going to interrupt here. Again, this distinction must be clear so that what is invalid may be easily discerned and devalued, released. You see, the distinction between the wheat and the tares must take place, so that only the wheat is gathered, because that is the only thing of value.
Now, if you have been functioning in an environment that is cluttered and disorderly, but you have been functioning in it in the dark, and therefore have not been able to perceive that there is disorder, and that, rather, things are "just the way they are," and you must live with it, then when the light comes, it can seem as though the service that the illumination is performing is a disservice, because it uncovers how much of a mess everything is -- and who wants to have mess uncovered blatantly? No one. So, the light is not immediately valued.
What the light does, though, is that it uncovers the disorder so that all of the pieces that are in their inappropriate place, may be re-placed where they belong, and thus be able to be enjoyed.
The clutter is the equivalent of the misperception, the delusion, the illusion, which is to be cleared up as a result of the illumination being present. Understand that the clutter is made up of all that is Real, which has not been experienced truly, and when all that is Real is seen in its proper perspective, or right place, then it becomes truly divinely enjoyable.
The illumination, the presence of the Light, the influx of enlightenment, does not get rid of the environment. Likewise, it does not get rid of the body, of the world, of the things in the world or of the universe. It allows the misunderstandings, due to coming to conclusions in the dark, to be released. The misunderstandings are the "attack on God," in terms of the Course. The misconceptions, the misinterpretations, and the conclusions arrived at as a result of them, are the "attack" on what is Real, because they constitute a perception different from what is true -- a misperception that is inevitable when it is arrived at in darkness. The misperception, taken as fact, stands between the one embracing the perception and the actual experience of Reality. But Reality, the environment is not annihilated with the coming of the Light.
QUESTION: So, in my terms, that is to say that God does intend physical manifestation such as the earth and human beings as part of His expression?
RAJ: Absolutely. Except, that it is only from within the framework of the misperception, of the ego's frame of reference, that the divine manifestations of God called earth and all of the life forms, and body, and universe, are interpreted as physical, as something other than pure Mind, as mental experiences of the thought and intent of the Father.
The Father does not intend to express himself physically, and the fact is that every "physical form" you see is absolutely divine and totally mental. The concept that it exists as physical matter, separate and different from the things of the Spirit, is part of the delusion, and therefore stands as "an attack on God," an attack on, or a deprivation of, the true experience of the Father in HIS Nature and character expressed as every single form, reflected in each and every form.
You are beginning to grasp what the word "attack" is referring to. It is not referring to the form, but the solid conviction, which has evolved that form is physical, totally different from mind, self-existent, and unlike Spirit.
That is the context in which form is being examined. That is the context in which conclusions about form are arrived at. And that is what denies one the undistorted clear experience of the divinity of everything. Therefore, since it blocks one from the experience of Reality, it constitutes a denial of Reality, and therefore in Course terms, an "attack on God."
QUESTION: Now I'm getting a bit confused. Is it God's intention to express Himself in what I would call a "physical being" who walks around on the ground and eats things and makes love and breathes, and does those things? Or is that not divine? Is divinity some kind of pure absolute Light that I don't yet perceive, and then when I perceive truly, it won't be anything like the physical -- it will be something else altogether?
RAJ: It will be everything that you are aware of in an entirely new light. Let me put it this way. If you were totally grounded -- always moved around on the surface of the planet -- and your perceptions of your community, and even of your earth, were gathered on the basis of that experience, then the first time you went up in a plane, it would be a very surprising experience to see everything that you were familiar with with that new perspective -- to see the grid lines of the streets, the movement of people and automobiles from a great vertical height. Indeed, when your first vehicles went far out from the surface of your planet and you had the opportunity to see the whole planet in one view, it was, again, surprising, and created a shift of awareness, but one that was relative to absolutely everything you were already aware of. Clouds were not new, but to see their patterns as they move over the ocean and the continents, to grasp in one view the totality, constituted a brand new and less limited perception.
Again, when the first individual set foot on the moon, it changed completely the context in which the moon had been previously experienced. And it caused each individual aware of the accomplishment to know that his foot could have been the one standing there, and therefore he was no longer earth bound. This made each man on the planet an explorer of space that had seemed unjustifiable and truly inconceivable except as fantasy.
Now, absolutely everything you are already familiar with will be part of your awareness when you are not suffering from any delusion about it, but it will be as though everything is new.
Much of your interpretation of your forms and your world is biased by your fundamental delusions. Therefore, you will not only see with new perspective by virtue of a "higher altitude" of perception, but you will find yourself very quickly rid of the misperceptions about things which will cause you to experience them in a new way which is not just perceptual. In effect, it will involve your experiencing your oneness with all things, and that all things are one with you, and that that oneness constitutes not a relationship, but a communion, which means that all things are some aspect of your Self, and you are some aspect of all things.
Your definition and experience of Self will become unlimited, even though there will still be that specific form which specifically identifies you, which you presently refer to as your body.
Now, at the present time, that is all the further we need to explore this. But that gives you some inkling.
QUESTION: My difficulty with that is, that it is very "metaphysical," and it seems to me what I need to know -- like whether I support work on this plane that will manifest as health or what would appear to be regenerated tissues ...
RAJ: There is only the presence of the Father to be present in. There truly are not "other" planes. Since that is true, then you might as well be about the business of discovering the Father in the only place there is to experience Him, and that is right where you are, and relative to your body, and relative to those on your continent or on your globe.
QUESTION: I want to get clear on this. We're saying that there is a divine "physical" manifestation that doesn't age and die, and that it would be reasonable for me to expect that if I were unified, whole, then I would experience my physical beingness as strong, youthful, healthy, graceful, perfect in form, and not going through aging and debilitation. Is that true?
QUESTION: And it would not decay and fall down. It may do something else to leave the "physical," but it would remain in some perfectly healthy functional worldly form until it decided to do something else?
RAJ: That is correct. And instead of using the word "physical," let's say stay in "manifestation," even though the manifestation may move elsewhere.
QUESTION: Yes, but the manifestation, in the process of moving, would not age, debilitate, degenerate, and lose vitality?
RAJ: That is absolutely correct.
QUESTION: And it would still appear to be a human being with flesh and warmth, and all that?
RAJ: If that particular manifestation fulfills purpose, yes. I can appear to you in that form at this moment, but that is not the mode in which my body naturally exists, because it is a body of Light, and that which conveys what you are referring to as warmth, softness, that which makes a body pleasant to be with or to touch or to experience, is, instead, conveyed by means of colour, and also what you would be inclined to call -- because you do not have better words -- an electrical charge, an infinity of electrical charges. Yet, it is not electrical. It is the energy of Spirit, which is the essence of Meaning rendered visible -- manifest, in other words.
The Meanings that you are conveying by using the words "flesh," and "soft," and "warm," are present and recognizable as exactly what you are meaning, and yet the form, the manifestation conveying the Meaning is different. It does not have what I will call "material accompaniments."
The flesh you are speaking of seems to be capable of decaying and dying, of being dysfunctional. It seems capable of becoming cold, and still, and dead, which is not one of the potentials of the body seen without any distortion whatsoever.
Touching and being touched is also an experience that remains. And yet the "interface," if you will, is not limited to surfaces. And so, to only touch surfaces, as you experience it at the moment, is a very limited experience, which one would not want to return to, unless it was for the novelty of the experience.
QUESTION: Part of my difficulty in "bothering" with the demands of the body -- the demands for it to be taken care of, for it to eat, to be bandaged if it's wounded -- those demands seem purposeless to me unless I ...
I guess I'm looking for some assurance that the way from where I perceive myself to be now to where you're talking about lies through continuing to experience this physical experience and not just leaving.
RAJ: That is correct. If you left, you would find yourself in what you would still call a "physical experience," because until the enlightenment, the clearer view, has dawned in your thought, you will still interpret Reality in exactly the same ignorant way. And there is no short cut.
Now, I am going to say one more thing. The necessity relative to your body is to dare to think of the structure that you are experiencing as the "temple of the living God." I reiterate that the body must become embraced within your awareness of what God is, as being completely congruent with the Will of the Father, God's Purpose, and indeed is the manifestation of the Will of the Father in its Truth, or in its Actuality. You must do this so that you will begin to honor what it truly is in a true way, rather than demeaning it because you think it has nothing to do with God and therefore constitutes an impediment to your union with God.
As long as it is seen as an impediment, you will attempt to get out of, or away from, the very thing that is constituted of the presence of the Father, and you will continue to be in the dark, you will continue not to have gained your freedom from illusion.
QUESTION: Thank you for the reminder.
Conversations with Raj is made up of actual questions and answers drawn, with permission, from private conversations with Raj and public Workshops. Rajpur, an Ascended Master, is an Individuality making himself known by means of conscious channeling through Paul Norman Tuttle for the purpose of facilitating the major shift of consciousness which mankind is entering into.
Conversations with Raj is published monthly by ESTAR Foundation, 1221 Toledo St., Bellingham, WA 98226. Phone: 206-734-4418. Subscription price, prepaid, one year $36.00; single copy $3.00. Copyright Ó 1988 by ESTAR Foundation. All rights reserved.