CONVERSATIONS WITH RAJ
VOL. 4, NO. 2
QUESTION: The question has to do with the flip-flop from being centered to being anguished and tormented by the inability to affect the three-dimensional picture. I had a two-day period where I was not tormented, and the way I got into that was to ask to be given freedom from desires that I could not immediately fulfill. Now, the desire came back and asked to be addressed after a couple of days, and I'm wondering, is that a part of the process? Is that a good technique to stay centered -- to try to eliminate desires like that, or subdue them somehow?
RAJ: Actually, it is not the desires that you are being relieved of, but the impatience accompanying the desires. Value the desire, but understand this: Everything necessary to the fulfillment of that desire is included within the desire. So, if you simply embrace or feel the desire without automatically assuming that you, personally, are responsible for going out and making that desire come to fruition, then what will happen is that you will find yourself present with the desire when it reaches its point of fulfillment. And the fulfillment will be there without your feeling as though you had very much to do with it at all. It will be effortless on your part, and yet the fruition of it will be fully yours to experience.
It is not the desires that you want to become free of. It is the sense of responsibility around fulfilling the desire. It is the sense of impatience. And it is also the exercise of control, which is required in order to bring it about from a personal ego level. Those are the things that you want to be free of.
Desiring something does not cause frustration. It is an expression of love. It is You feeling something that you love. That does not create frustration. If you will learn to abide with the desire peacefully, you will be present with it when it is fulfilled.
QUESTION: That coincides exactly with what I know to be true. But, the words "when" it is fulfilled, that's always the big torment. What do I have to do to get it to happen at a certain time? What is the secret? What is the "when" all about?
RAJ: First of all, the reason you ask the question, and the reason the "when" seems important, is because at the present moment, you feel that there is a lack of fulfillment. So, in the face of that lack of fulfillment it becomes important as to when a particular desire is going to come into sharp focus and manifestation.
Now, let me put it this way. When the "when" becomes irrelevant, and you are willing to abide with the desire fully in the Now, You put yourself in the position of experiencing the "when" much sooner, because there is not a sense of conflict in you that constitutes a block to, or a distancing of the fulfillment from you. There is a statement in A Course in Miracles to the effect that, "infinite patience brings immediate results."
QUESTION: I went through some difficult financial times, and then came into some money, and I started tithing it religiously, with the intention of replenishing. Then I started thinking about "giving to get," and then I thought, "Well, no. It says that's okay to do, and that will replenish you." I'd like some comments on this issue, because it seemed like a good way to support oneself
RAJ: At a fundamental human level, the practice of giving is better than the practice of getting. It is a more positive orientation, a more harmony-producing dynamic. But, you must understand that you have in your experience exactly as much or as little as you allow yourself to have. Abundance is your birthright. It is therefore constantly confronting you. The reason you do not experience it is because, through beliefs and conditioning, you cannot justify having it -- you haven't put in enough hours at work, you haven't done this, etc., etc. "It is impossible for me to have what I haven't earned." So, you have only as much as you can justify having.
Now, the process of "gaining" your abundance is truly one of allowing it in, letting it in. If you give to get, if you cast your bread upon the water so that it will come back ten-fold, you are still attempting to exercise control. You, in effect, are attempting to strong-arm the Universe, and make It do what you want It to do. This is not an attitude of allowing, and it is an attitude that comes directly from the ego.
As long as anything you do causes something to happen that you can take credit for, from a personal level, you block your experience of finding, in Biblical terms, that "it is the Father's good pleasure to give you the Kingdom." You preclude yourself from having the opportunity to watch your fulfillment unfold just because you exist!
I encourage you to be alert to the subtle ways in which the ego insinuates itself into a spiritual practice and thus keeps you distanced from the truth of that spiritual practice.
QUESTION: This brings up another point. There is a conflict in my mind between "allowing" and the instruction to be real specific -- listing those things that you wish to have manifest in your experience. One seems to indicate no restriction, and the other, by being specific, does seem to involve some kind of restriction, and I don't know which path to take. It looks like a fork in the road, with no indication as to how they might be integrated.
RAJ: "Needs" are always specific. You need a glass of water, because you are thirsty. Or you need a garden hose to water your lawn. Or you need to get the lawn mower fixed so that you can mow the lawn.
Needs are always specific, and therefore the meeting of those needs is always specific. Therefore, it is actually to be a list indicating needs, not wants. That is an important difference.
The reason for listing them is so that you can be specifically aware of what it is that will meet the need, so that, in effect, you provide a vessel of a sort that can accommodate the fulfillment. If you are vague, then your abundance will be general and vague. This does not constitute a means of coercing infinite Intelligence. It is merely a matter of being prepared on your part for the receipt of the fulfillment.
Obviously, if you are going to borrow a cup of sugar, you will not attempt to get it in a thimble. So, being specifically aware is a matter of being practical in the sense of providing a container that will hold the thing that meets the need. It also gives you something specific to be alert for, even though you are not attempting to be alert to how you can make it happen.
If you wish to receive something, you must hold your hand out. That is not coercing the Universe. It is just an expression of intelligence. Then, you let the fulfillment of that need occur in its own unique way.
QUESTION: Is this like channeling, actually? Can you actually channel your supply in the same way you would channel the wisdom of another being?
RAJ: Yes, it is exactly the same. You let it in without biasing it with any preconceptions. Exactly, yes.
QUESTION: We talked about being specific about needs, and it was set along side the idea of wants. There may be things that I want to have that aren't truly needs. What do I do about that?
RAJ: You will find that as you are willing to be still, and to become centered, that you will become aware of desiring certain things. You will not have figured out what to desire, but you will be aware of what, is appropriate for you. What you will be aware of will be what is in absolute harmony with the movement of Fulfillment that your Being is.
As a result, you will find yourself knowing, for example, that it is appropriate to get a dishwasher. You will not have figured this out. It will not be an egotistical want. In fact, your rational mind might immediately afterward set to work to justify why that is not a reasonable thing at this time. But, if you are willing to pay attention to the awareness that has unfolded, because you have been listening, and then you are alert and curious to see just how the manifestation of the dishwasher is going to occur, because your Being is unfolding it and not your ego processes, you will be amazed to see . . .
QUESTION: I would like some amazement, I'll tell you!
RAJ: Then you must be willing to let your Being reveal to you what is appropriate for your fulfillment.
QUESTION: I see. I've got that. I really do. I know some things come from the ego level.
RAJ: Wants always come from the ego level.
QUESTION: I get it. Yeah. You know, I had a fulfillment a couple of months ago, where I got enough money to have some nice things done to the house. I put out for it. It was, as you say, appropriate. Yet, for the life of me, up until this moment, I hadn't seen how that was different from my desiring to have a new BMW without paying for it, or miraculously having a new car. And I say, "Gee, whiz! What's so much better about having the yard worked on and the garage door replaced than having a nice new car?" But, that fulfillment came, bang! I didn't do anything. I was amazed. Yet, I'm beginning to see some difference now. That came because it was appropriate at the moment. Is that right?
RAJ: That is exactly correct. It will seem to you as though there is time involved -- or timing -- where everything fits together in a flawless and even somewhat complex way, and yet you had to figure out none of it in order for it to fit together so beautifully. This is part of the joy of being in this way, as opposed to exercising developed skill to get what you want.
QUESTION: In other words, I don't really have to pay too much attention to my wants. They're not challenges I'm failing to meet because I want them and I should be meditating more to get them. It almost seems like I'm not doing the processes right, you know?
RAJ: You see, the assumption is that if you do not want and you do not exercise skill at "getting it," that you will not be fulfilling your potential as a human being, and also that you are being irresponsible.
I encourage you, when you are aware of wants to meditate -- and I mean this in the sense of becoming still -- and then inquire whether this want is truly appropriate for you at this time. Then, I encourage you to trust the answer, because it will help you to separate the wants from the needs, or the wants from what is actually appropriate for you and which will actually constitute fulfillment for you.
QUESTION: I understand that my higher Self will not bring me anything that is going to make me feel worse.
RAJ: That is absolutely correct, even though in the process, if you are not quite ready to receive as much as your Being is giving, you may feel worse because of the resistance you bring to the process.
QUESTION: I spoke with someone who said that you indicated there would be some economic shifting in this year. I'm in the stock market right now. Do you have any comments about what I should do about that?
RAJ: Be very alert and very intuitive. There should not be any problem that you would need to respond to until June. And that will just be the beginning of the time that you would need to, perhaps, withdraw some investments, or change your investments. It is the last of the year -- and specifically the last quarter of the year -- in which things will tend to be unstable and rough.
I would encourage you, when you make any transactions where you cash out certain investments and are ready to reinvest, to seriously consider, intuitively, the appropriateness of obtaining gold that you can have in your possession -- not futures, not on paper, but in your hand. There is no need to be alarmed, but during the next six months, be alert and sense into what is appropriate for you.
Now, do understand that it is the intent of your Being to fulfill Itself perfectly, and It has infinite resources with which to do so. It is not confined to economic conditions. If you are attentive, with peace, you will know exactly what to do and when to do it in order for your abundance to be uninterrupted. So, no matter what the outward conditions seem to be, you do not need to automatically assume that they have anything to do with you.
QUESTION: In other words, we don't have to be wearing rags a year from now just because there has been chaos economically. People can still have their "stuff"?
RAJ: That is absolutely correct! And that is an important point to understand.
QUESTION: I have mentioned that I am not comfortable with Ramtha. Do you have anything to say about that?
RAJ: It is really very simple. Those who are at points other than where you are in your development find Ramtha hitting the nail squarely on the head for them in terms of promoting their awakening. You simply need to honor your awareness that everything about Ramtha is not nourishing you, even though some things are. Go where your questions and your doubts are being answered in the most complete way, and do not assume that there is anything wrong with a source that is not answering your questions and doubts.
You see, the message is going to get through to every belief level, and what constitutes the difference between belief levels are ego structures. So, the message will always be congruent with the belief structures so that the Individuality hiding behind those ego structures can be reached. There will not be absolute consistency of the message because the ego structures being dealt with are not consistent.
QUESTION: What you seem to be saying is that the recipients are creating their own message for awakening.
RAJ: Let me put it this way: Their need is being met in the language of their present discernment, so that it can mean something for them.
QUESTION: Suppose I were to confront somebody like Constance Cumbey, who is a woman who spends a lot of time attacking New Age thinking. I know that she is somehow there because I need to look at my own doubts about all of this stuff. Can you tell me a little bit about the mind-sets that make people resist the New Age type of thought?
RAJ: Very simply, there is a firm belief held by many that life is polarized, that there are, indeed opposing powers, and that if they are not careful, the negative will consume them. There is no sense of the fundamental unity of Life and the fact that all that causes there to seem to be negativity is the resistance one provides to perceiving the unity.
The context of duality blinds them and binds them into an ongoing state of conflict, of good vs. evil, when the only way out of that dilemma is the realization that the duality is only a belief. You can understand, in this way, why one would express himself/herself, as Constance Cumbey does, without believing that you have to believe what she is saying.
QUESTION: I don't want to have to reform her. I keep thinking, "I need to shake these people up!" I have a friend who became a fundamentalist Christian a couple of years ago, and I always feel like that's a challenge. Part of me says, "Let her have her truth." Then another part of me says, "God, this is going in the wrong direction." How should I treat people like this, who are pushing my "disapproval" buttons and my "savior" buttons?
RAJ: The problem is one of egotism, because there is an assumption on your part that your leading edge, which you are on, is the right one for everyone. This is not correct. Each one, as I have said before, is always standing, as far forward on his/her leading edge as it is possible for him to stand. It is not up to anyone to decide what the leading edge should be for another, because at the bottom line, one's leading edge is always constituted of the closest boundary or ego structure. And therefore the ego structure, which must be dealt with next in the process of his releasing himself from the limits of that structure.
You are dealing, at the present time, with those ego structures, which immediately block your forward progress. Although you might have three structures, which are identical to structures that someone else has -- let us say that they are jealousy, vulnerability, and hate -- the one that constitutes the most significant block for you may be jealousy, and for the other it may be hate. Therefore, there is no appropriate way for either of you to decide that the other is dealing with the wrong one.
You must, in effect, deal with the next "fence" that blocks your freedom.
QUESTION: This is a little harder for me to understand than some of the other things -- this rivalry and competitiveness between egos and the fact that there is no real basis for comparison or communication on the ego level.
RAJ: Yes. What is the difficulty you are having?
QUESTION: Understanding the answer.
RAJ: Let me put it this way: There are those who are like infants in their spiritual development. Of course, this is all relative, but there are those who do not have the "teeth" needed to chew a piece of tough beef. It is appropriate for them to have Pablum or strained vegetables, because this is the most they can deal with at the moment with the "spiritual equipment" that they have. So, it is inappropriate for one who is chewing tough beef to go to that other one and say, "This is really what you ought to have."
QUESTION: My ego takes pride, sometimes, in how far it has brought me, if you know what I mean.
RAJ: Again, you must understand that divine Love meets each one where he is, and in the language of that one's present perception!
QUESTION: And this applies even to people who are preaching cosmic polarity? Is that divine Love meeting their needs?
RAJ: That is absolutely correct. I will explain it this way. If one has not discovered that through the application of reason and intelligence he can arrive at correct answers -- let us say that we are speaking of mathematics -- then it becomes very difficult for that one to grasp the idea that there is an infinite Principle that he can let himself go into, or yield to.
There is a process, in one's awakening, of learning how to express intelligence in order to exercise control so that he can see that the effect of intelligence is order. Yet, he must then arrive at a point where he is willing to let go of that exercise of control so that he may move into the conscious experience of the infinite Harmony of his Being, which he is not personally responsible for.
If he has not grasped at an experiential level that the exercise of intelligence results in harmony, he will be too afraid to let go into an infinite Intelligence and trust that the result will be harmony for him. So, there is value for those at certain levels of development to understand polarities, to be taught polarities. There are those who need literally, you might say, to be scared into paying attention, because otherwise they won't pay attention. Once their attention has been gotten, they can be moved out of that level.
QUESTION: I would like to ask some questions about fear. I was in a Course in Miracles group today and someone was talking about fear. I said that what I did with fear was to just be with fear when I needed to and then ask the Holy Spirit to remove it. Someone quoted a line from the Course saying, "seek not to have fear removed." I became very confused. So, I'd really like some comments on what to do specifically with fears.
RAJ: First of all, fear never stands by itself. It never exists independently. It is like the "tails" on a coin. It cannot be present without the "heads" also being present. To get rid of the tails would also constitute getting rid of the heads, and also the coin, itself. Likewise, to get rid of the negative pole on a battery would constitute losing the battery, itself, and its purpose, and therefore you would lose the power which the battery is supplying to your automobile, or whatever the instrument is that is utilizing the battery.
Very simply, fear is blocked love. It is therefore blocked Self. You do not want to get rid of the fear, because it is very strongly attached to that which it is the apparent blockage of. Therefore, it is necessary, as you have indicated, to stay with the fear.
Actually, when you speak of "staying with the fear," you do not mean just lolling in it, just mucking around in it. When you speak of being with the fear and asking for the Holy Spirit to, in effect, relieve you of it, you are literally asking for the ability to move through the fear to that which is underlying it, which is, in effect, your Love -- your Love that has seemed to be blocked. In actuality, when you turn this fear over to the Holy Spirit, you are asking the Holy Spirit to help you "bridge the gap," so that you are able to get to that experience of your Integrity that allows the Love that You Are to once again begin to flow.
So, the necessity is to recognize that you are experiencing fear because you are blocking the essential flow of your Being at some conscious level. You must further understand that you cannot block the flow of your Being and be comfortable, and that the discomfort is what you call "fear."
The statement that it is inappropriate to have the fear removed means that it is inappropriate for you to see it as something existing in and of itself. Any negative of any kind, whether it is fear, hate, or jealousy -- any fear -- is a blockage of Reality. In order to get rid of the negative, there must be a desire to experience the Reality underlying that negative. In desiring it, it allows your point of awareness to move through the fear and connect with that aspect of your essential Being which had been blocked. By virtue of your connection with It, It is allowed to move freely into expression. When that movement occurs, the fear leaves, the hatred leaves, the jealousy dissolves.
One must never arrive at a point where he assumes that fear has a valid place, that it serves a valid purpose, and that it can actually be a contributing factor to one's spiritual growth. Surprisingly enough, negatives very often are interpreted as the "hand of divine Providence" moving one along his spiritual path. The Fact is that in reality, one is always moving along his spiritual path, and it is only when he resists it that he creates for himself the discomfort that he calls fear, or any other negative.
You must not ever honor fear. You must always, as I said, recognize it as an attempt to block one's essential divinity at some level.
Fear is one of the dynamics of the ego, and, as you are aware, you cannot get rid of the ego by attacking the ego. In this sense, you cannot get rid of fear by attacking fear. As I have said before, the ego has no means of responding to your simple disregard of it. When you desire, right at the moment when you are experiencing some fear, to experience the underlying Reality of your Being, which the fear is indicative of your repression of, you are, in effect, disregarding the fear. You are not choosing to focus in on it, magnify it, or do anything with it.
You deal with fear by not dealing with it, just as you deal with the ego by not dealing with it. You deal with it by disregarding it and desiring to move into the conscious awareness of your Self that underlies the false or partial ego sense.
QUESTION: I have a question about predictions of earth changes. It's really hard not to be influenced by these predictions, having heard them from many, many sources over the last several years. I try hard to eliminate them from my thinking. You advised me not to move on the basis of those predictions, but the predictions are there, and I don't quite know what to do with them.
RAJ: You are aware that in the process of raising children, you are confronted with apparently undeniable historical evidence that there are certain children's diseases that they are bound to go through if you do not provide inoculations for this and that and the other thing.
Now, it is very hard not to believe that. But, I will tell you this: It is not inevitable that they will get this, that, or the other disease. It is not inevitable that at certain points of their development they are bound to have problems -- let us say, when they are teenagers, having acne, and disoriented experiences for girls as their bodies go through chemical and physical changes in the maturing process, etc.
You must understand that it is the individuality and his belief structures or his understanding, his clarity, which governs. There are many parents who raise their children without fearing the "normal" onslaught of this disease and that disease, et cetera, and who instill in their children an awareness that they are not subject to their world, but that their world is subject to their clarity and for them to claim their birthright of invulnerability. Those children who do, or those children who live in a family where the parents claim it, strongly enough, do not go through these apparently inevitable disease processes.
Now, you must always dare to bring everything back to the Individuality -- and in your case, it is you. You know that you can live in a town along with another person who has had nothing but rotten luck and you know that you can go through your daily affairs and have everything fall into place with relative ease while this other person would describe his experience as one of constant struggle, of constant misunderstanding, of constantly having doors closed in his or her face. The two of you could sound as though you were talking about two entirely different places on your planet, yet you would be talking about the same location.
Now, what constitutes the difference? The difference is in the vantage point, or the mind-sets, or the mental context in which the two of you are viewing your world. The one who views his world as hostile and acts accordingly -- in other words, in a defensive/aggressive way -- elicits for himself more and more trauma. The one who approaches it with a sense of his or her own integrity and its oneness with the integrity of his environment finds the very same environment feeding back entirely opposite experiences.
Now, the simple fact is that there are individuals on your planet who are working from what can only be called irresponsible mental contexts. They believe that they have no power, no authority over their experience, and therefore they are always potential victims of it. They approach their world and their life defensively -- in other words, always in some form of attack. They evolve for themselves, and are evolving for themselves, feedback, which, for them, will be negative. It will match what they are believing and what they are acting out.
These people need to recognize the role they are playing in evolving the future. They need to know what direction it is moving in. And the reason is not so they can move to locations where they will not be hurt by the changes. The reason is to bring them to a point of taking responsibility, of recognizing their authority in the situation, and changing, so that there is no place to run from, and no need to run to "pockets of safety."
Now, it is important for you not to misunderstand the reason for these prophecies. They are, in the final analysis, to cause individuals to take responsibility for the way they are viewing their world, and leave the false basis of conflict, hostility, and attack, so they may move into a more loving awareness of the Oneness of the Universe, the oneness of all Creation -- to the point where they are willing to cooperate with everything else and flow in harmony with it, and not express such aggressive individuality that they are not taking anyone or anything else into consideration at all, and thus act at odds with the Whole.
Now, I am simply conveying to you, for you, the appropriate steps for approaching any move you make. Do it from the standpoint of being in harmony with the place you are going to move to, and with a sense of the integrity of your world and your Self. Therefore, I am promoting, with you, the very thing that everyone else needs to come to an awareness of also. In dealing with you, we are dealing at the point where the correction of the future can occur.
I will tell you this. Even though others may run into conflict, even though there may be much gnashing of teeth as this shift of consciousness occurs, because individuals are resisting it and wanting to maintain what they call their ability to "be themselves," you can be present, experiencing the fulfillment of every one of your needs, surrounded by and encountering people who are in complete harmony with you. And, in effect, you can be on the same world with these other people, and yet your individual reports of what will be going on will sound like the difference between heaven and hell.
I am not suggesting by those terms that there are going to be dire circumstances. But, I will tell you that there are those who will dig in their feet so deeply that the stress between what their "will" is trying to do and where their Being is moving them to, will be very great for them, very uncomfortable for them, until they decide to flow with the will of their Being, which is inseparable from the Will of the Father. This is simply part of their growth, but cannot serve as the basis for your actions in your life.
Conversations with Raj is published monthly by Kairos, Inc., P.O. Box 71280 Seattle, Washington, U.S.A. 98107. Subscription price, prepaid, one year $36.00; single copy, $4.00. © 1986 Paul Norman Tuttle. All rights reserved.